The Blonde in the Game (2×4)

 

Written By: Noah Hawley

Directed By: Bryan Spicer

B&B come on the scene of a body. A dog is not letting them get too close.

BOOTH: You ever have a dog, Bones?

BRENNAN: I always wanted a pig.

BOOTH: A pig.

BRENNAN: Very smart, and despite the popular misconception, very clean.

BOOTH: Yeah, I prefer my pig with a little mint, a little honey glaze –

BRENNAN: Not funny.  In some cultures, dogs can guard corpses, sometimes to the point of starvation, so … shoot it.

BOOTH: I’m – I’m not shooting him for just doing what comes naturally. As far as he’s concerned, you know, finder’s keepers.

BRENNAN: That dog is compromising the integrity of my remains, so wing it – him.

They take the body to the lab and the evidence suggests this is the work of someone they know.

CAM: Hello? New team member in the room.

BRENNAN: Howard Epps, a serial killer on death row.

BOOTH: Killed at least three.

HODGINS: We found two of ’em last year.

ANGELA: The judge stayed his execution to try him on the new charges.

CAM: You saved his life. Ironic.

BRENNAN: The timeframe fits. This girl would have been killed about … six months before Epps went to prison.

BOOTH: Run her through the database, get an I.D.

CAM: Why don’t you just ask him?

BOOTH: Well, because last time Bones saw Epps, it– got violent.

BRENNAN: He touched me with his creepy serial killer hands.

Booth pays him a visit.

EPPS: Agent Booth. What took you so long? And where’s Doctor Brennan?

EPPS: You know … those hack doctors at the prison infirmary … did a miserable job setting my wrist. It aches all the time, and I don’t have a full range of movement.And let me tell you, when you’re stuck in a prison cell for 23 hours a day, there’s really only one thing you can do to pass the time. And I need my wrist.

BOOTH: Well, I’m sure Doctor Brennan would be … happy to re-break it for you.

Booth threatens Epps and returns to report back to the team. Zack is intrigued by the game Epps seems to want to play.

BOOTH: Look, I already know what he wants. I told you. He wants Bones sitting across the table from him.

BRENNAN: Three rational players. Me, Booth, and Epps. What about the nondeliberative agent?

BOOTH: What did she say?

ZACK: In a game, there tends to be one “N” rational players and a nonconscious, nondeliberative agent. What did Epps talk about before he said all the information you needed was in front of you?

BOOTH: Mom, Bones, blondes, his wrist being set badly after Bones broke it … And, um, you know, he – he made the point that he … really needed his wrist.

ZACK: Chronic masturbation. The game may be all about self-gratification.

BRENNAN: The phrase he used was “right in front of us.”

BOOTH: Yes.

ZACK: The … blonde is right in front of us.

BRENNAN: And she has a wrist. Well, two, in fact.

BOOTH: You know, if you had a pet pig, what would you name him?

BRENNAN: Jasper.

BOOTH: Oh.

Hmm….what makes Booth ask this at that this time? Is he sneaking it out of her while she’s focused on the case?

They figure out what Epps meant.

BRENNAN: It belongs with a second body. There’s another victim out there, somewhere.

ZACK:  Round one … goes to Howard Epps.

BOOTH: Why?

BRENNAN: Because he gets what he wants. Me in the room with him.

B&B meet Caroline Epps.

 

CAROLINE: Oh, Agent Booth. Howard’s told me you both saved his life last year.

BOOTH: It was our pleasure.

BRENNAN: What? I was disappointed.

CAROLINE: Extending Howard’s life has given him time to come to grips with what he’s done – to ask God for forgiveness.

BOOTH: Then we did the right thing by having his execution stayed.

BRENNAN: Are you on some kind of medication?

BOOTH: Bones.

CAROLINE: Doctor Brennan, I’m not one of those crazy women who falls in love with death row killers.

BRENNAN: Obviously, that’s exactly what you are.

BOOTH: Listen, if the prison ever gives you a hard time in coming to see your husband, just give me a call. I might be able to help.

CAROLINE: Thank you, Agent Booth.

BRENNAN: Are you serious? She’s crazy.

BOOTH: Chop-chop. Let’s go. Thank you. Nice to see you.

CAROLINE: Nice to meet you both.

BRENNAN: Why were you nice to her?

BOOTH: Because we might need her.

B&B go to visit Epps again. Booth tried to explain his strategy of playing dumb.

BOOTH: Don’t be mad at me, Bones. My telling you to shut up was a ploy.

BRENNAN: Now he thinks you’re an idiot.

BOOTH: Game theory, Bones, okay?  For two players to gain advantage over the one, they must be distinct from each other.

BRENNAN: Where’d you get that?

ZACK: From me. I suggested that you be the smart one.

BOOTH: Which, you know, left me making a ploy that, uh, was supposed to be lame.

BRENNAN: Don’t enjoy this.

Meanwhile, the squints get to talking.

HODGINS: Booth thinks we should get together and buy Brennan a pet.

ZACK: What kind of a pet?

HODGINS: A pig. And I don’t think he means a guinea pig. A real pig. Like a Mulefoot, Saddleback, or pot belly.

B&B are back out in the field. They realize there are fresh victims while Epps was locked up.

BOOTH: You know, you remember when I was nice to her and you weren’t? This is why.

 

Nonchalant interrogation

B&B found out there is a missing nun. They search for clues then visit Epps again.

EPPS: Did you hear? I’m gonna be a father. The judge granted our petition for artificial insemination. (turns to Brennan, looking mildly smug) When I make my donation to the baby bank, I’m gonna be thinking about you.

BRENNAN: For all your … faults, Mr. Epps, you were never interested in letting your victims suffer. You didn’t torture them. You’re not that kind of man. She’s an innocent child.

EPPS: She’s a young woman … and there’s no such thing as an innocent woman. Look within yourself. You know I’m right. You know, I’m just guessing here, you understand, but I think you’ll find that Helen Majors has less than 24 hours to live. Better get going.

Angela and Brennan talk.

ANGELA: What are you asking me for?

BRENNAN: You said you’ve dealt with manipulative men before.

ANGELA: Sweetie, this is a psycho killer, not some loser who wants you to cosign a loan for his Jet Ski.

BRENNAN: Epps is pushing me around, Ange. He’s in control. I hate that.

ANGELA: You know; Epps is acting kind of like a boyfriend.

BRENNAN: What?

ANGELA: Well, you obviously fascinate him. He can’t have you, and he can’t kill you. So … he wants to make you hate yourself.

BRENNAN: God, Ange. What kind of boyfriends have you had?

ANGELA: Let’s keep the focus on you and Epps, okay?

BRENNAN: Okay.

ANGELA: Epps knows that you’ll never forgive yourself if you don’t find Helen Majors before she’s murdered.

BRENNAN: Not only is Helen being tortured, but … her family must be in agony.

ANGELA: You see? This is what he’s doing. He’s putting pictures in your mind. He’s messing with your objectivity.

BRENNAN: There’s nothing I can do about that.

ANGELA: You have to step back, okay? Let the rest of us deal with the families. You find Helen. That’ll keep Epps from … getting a Jet Ski outta you.

While Brennan emotionally struggles with the case, Booth brings in female reinforcements.

BOOTH: Caroline Epps. She knows something. She just won’t talk to me.

CAM: Why?

BOOTH: I’m a man, last time I checked.

CAM: But she’ll talk to a woman?

BOOTH: That’s my thinking.

CAM: Fine. I’ll do it.

BOOTH: Oh, no. You can’t sarcasm it out of her. You have to connect.

CAM: You don’t wanna send Brennan?

BOOTH: No – Angela.

CAM: Angela’s an artist, an expert in 3-D reconstruction.

BOOTH: Well, unlike you and Bones, Angela is, uh –

CAM:  What?

BOOTH: She’s better with the living than she is the dead.

Off to the Royal Diner..

ANGELA: Thanks for coming.

CAROLINE:  I’ve told your people everything I know. I don’t see the point of this.

ANGELA: I know this is disturbing. I find it very upsetting, and I’m … not married to the man who did it.

CAROLINE: I love Howard, Miss Montenegro.

ANGELA: I believe you.

CAROLINE:  No one’s ever said that to me.

ANGELA: I think you’d have to love him very much … to be willing to overlook what he’s done.

CAROLINE: Done in the past.

Girl you are in such denial…

ANGELA: The thing is, we’re not so sure that it was in the past. For Howard, it’s obvious what he likes. Blonde girls.

CAROLINE: Not me, you mean.

ANGELA: Men can’t hide what they like. For Howard, it’s this.

CAROLINE: Men can change what they look at.

ANGELA: Does Howard ever just look at you –  as though you just feel his eyes adoring you?

CAROLINE: He – he asks for magazines, DVDs. He’s – he’s very specific.

ANGELA: He likes blonde girls.

CAROLINE: Always the blonde girls. M-maybe if I – if I dyed my hair –

ANGELA: I’m sorry. I have to ask you something … Have you ever delivered any messages for Howard?

CAROLINE: Don’t you miss them?

ANGELA: I’m sorry?

CAROLINE:  I wrote the message “Don’t you miss them?” on a – on a – on a piece of paper, and slipped it into a mailbox.

ANGELA: Whose mailbox?

CAROLINE: Um, a man named Henry Gerber who Howard knew from prison. Howard calls Henry “The Mad German.”

ANGELA: When did you deliver the message?

CAROLINE: F – five days ago.

ANGELA: Thank you.

CAROLINE:  C – Can – can – will you sit with me … just a moment longer?

ANGELA: I’m – I have to make a phone call. You understand? But after that, I’ll sit with you … as long as you like.

They finally find the accomplice and his house.

BRENNAN: Oh.

BOOTH: God. I hate the serial killer wall of death.

B&B go out to find the last victim, who may still be alive.

BOOTH: All right. (gives Brennan a gun) Here.

BRENNAN: I didn’t even have to ask!

BOOTH: Yeah, well, just be careful, all right? Don’t shoot me. Don’t shoot Helen Majors. Otherwise –

They find the victim, alive.

The killer and Booth engage, but Brennan ends up shooting the killer.

BRENNAN: I had to shoot him.

BOOTH: Yeah. I’m glad you did. 

Back to Epps.

EPPS: Lappin’s dead?

BOOTH: Shot resisting arrest.

EPPS: Who shot him?

BRENNAN: Hmm.

EPPS: It was you, wasn’t it? You shot him? Did he take long to die? Did he suffer? This is better than I hoped. I thought it would be you. How did it feel? Dirty, yes? But there’s also a rush. Pleasure. Part of you liked it.

BRENNAN: This whole game was to have us kill someone?

EPPS: Who’s gonna tell Lappin’s mom? She loves him very much, you know. Without her son, she’ll be completely alone in this sad world.

BOOTH: We’re done with you. You’re never gonna see us again. Come on.

EPPS: I’m pretty sure you’re wrong about that, Agent Booth.

Time for a post-case wrap up.

BOOTH: Vodka?

BRENNAN: It’s water. But it’s – on the rocks.

Also, I love you.

BOOTH: You know, Bones, I’m not sure you grasp the basic theory on how to get drunk. Hey…what you need to do is order a shot of hard liquor … from a bartender named Shaky…And tell him to, uh, leave the bottle on the bar…

I love you, too.

BRENNAN: I’m fine, Booth.  I’m sitting here thinking about it, and … I’m fine.

BOOTH: Okay. So what I’m gettin’ from you here, Bones, is that you’re fine.

BRENNAN: He murdered Sarah. He was about to murder Helen. You know, why should I feel upset about shooting him? You know, I mean, if I was going to be upset, which I’m not … it would be because Epps thinks he beat us, so –

BOOTH: He didn’t.

BRENNAN: I know.

BOOTH: You’re upset because you think he beat us. You know what? He did.

BRENNAN: Beat us?

BOOTH: Yeah.

BRENNAN: Well, you just said that he didn’t.

BOOTH: Well, I changed my mind.

BRENNAN: What, in the last three seconds?

BOOTH: You know, you’re afraid that Epps turned you into him – into a killer. You have to come to grips with the fact that you killed another human being. Because when you kill someone, you know, there’s a cost. It’s a steep cost. I know. I’ve done it.

BRENNAN: I did the right thing.

BOOTH: I know. I was there.

BOOTH: I got something for ya.

BRENNAN: A bottle of hard liquor?

 

BOOTH: Hmm? Meet … Jasper.

BOOTH: You’re gonna be okay.

BRENNAN: Yeah?

BOOTH: Definitely.

Just a gratuitous Booth pic for you all 🙂