Written By: Noah Hawley
Directed By: Bryan Spicer
B&B come on the scene of a body. A dog is not letting them get too close.
BOOTH: You ever have a dog, Bones?
BRENNAN: I always wanted a pig.
BOOTH: A pig.
BRENNAN: Very smart, and despite the popular misconception, very clean.
BOOTH: Yeah, I prefer my pig with a little mint, a little honey glaze –
BRENNAN: Not funny. In some cultures, dogs can guard corpses, sometimes to the point of starvation, so … shoot it.
BOOTH: I’m – I’m not shooting him for just doing what comes naturally. As far as he’s concerned, you know, finder’s keepers.
BRENNAN: That dog is compromising the integrity of my remains, so wing it – him.
They take the body to the lab and the evidence suggests this is the work of someone they know.
CAM: Hello? New team member in the room.
BRENNAN: Howard Epps, a serial killer on death row.
BOOTH: Killed at least three.
HODGINS: We found two of ’em last year.
ANGELA: The judge stayed his execution to try him on the new charges.
CAM: You saved his life. Ironic.
BRENNAN: The timeframe fits. This girl would have been killed about … six months before Epps went to prison.
BOOTH: Run her through the database, get an I.D.
CAM: Why don’t you just ask him?
BOOTH: Well, because last time Bones saw Epps, it– got violent.
BRENNAN: He touched me with his creepy serial killer hands.
Booth pays him a visit.
EPPS: Agent Booth. What took you so long? And where’s Doctor Brennan?
EPPS: You know … those hack doctors at the prison infirmary … did a miserable job setting my wrist. It aches all the time, and I don’t have a full range of movement.And let me tell you, when you’re stuck in a prison cell for 23 hours a day, there’s really only one thing you can do to pass the time. And I need my wrist.
BOOTH: Well, I’m sure Doctor Brennan would be … happy to re-break it for you.
Booth threatens Epps and returns to report back to the team. Zack is intrigued by the game Epps seems to want to play.
BOOTH: Look, I already know what he wants. I told you. He wants Bones sitting across the table from him.
BRENNAN: Three rational players. Me, Booth, and Epps. What about the nondeliberative agent?
BOOTH: What did she say?
ZACK: In a game, there tends to be one “N” rational players and a nonconscious, nondeliberative agent. What did Epps talk about before he said all the information you needed was in front of you?
BOOTH: Mom, Bones, blondes, his wrist being set badly after Bones broke it … And, um, you know, he – he made the point that he … really needed his wrist.
ZACK: Chronic masturbation. The game may be all about self-gratification.
BRENNAN: The phrase he used was “right in front of us.”
ZACK: The … blonde is right in front of us.
BRENNAN: And she has a wrist. Well, two, in fact.
BOOTH: You know, if you had a pet pig, what would you name him?
Hmm….what makes Booth ask this at that this time? Is he sneaking it out of her while she’s focused on the case?
They figure out what Epps meant.
BRENNAN: It belongs with a second body. There’s another victim out there, somewhere.
ZACK: Round one … goes to Howard Epps.
BRENNAN: Because he gets what he wants. Me in the room with him.
B&B meet Caroline Epps.
CAROLINE: Oh, Agent Booth. Howard’s told me you both saved his life last year.
BOOTH: It was our pleasure.
BRENNAN: What? I was disappointed.
CAROLINE: Extending Howard’s life has given him time to come to grips with what he’s done – to ask God for forgiveness.
BOOTH: Then we did the right thing by having his execution stayed.
BRENNAN: Are you on some kind of medication?
CAROLINE: Doctor Brennan, I’m not one of those crazy women who falls in love with death row killers.
BRENNAN: Obviously, that’s exactly what you are.
BOOTH: Listen, if the prison ever gives you a hard time in coming to see your husband, just give me a call. I might be able to help.
CAROLINE: Thank you, Agent Booth.
BRENNAN: Are you serious? She’s crazy.
BOOTH: Chop-chop. Let’s go. Thank you. Nice to see you.
CAROLINE: Nice to meet you both.
BRENNAN: Why were you nice to her?
BOOTH: Because we might need her.
B&B go to visit Epps again. Booth tried to explain his strategy of playing dumb.
BOOTH: Don’t be mad at me, Bones. My telling you to shut up was a ploy.
BRENNAN: Now he thinks you’re an idiot.
BOOTH: Game theory, Bones, okay? For two players to gain advantage over the one, they must be distinct from each other.
BRENNAN: Where’d you get that?
ZACK: From me. I suggested that you be the smart one.
BOOTH: Which, you know, left me making a ploy that, uh, was supposed to be lame.
BRENNAN: Don’t enjoy this.
Meanwhile, the squints get to talking.
HODGINS: Booth thinks we should get together and buy Brennan a pet.
ZACK: What kind of a pet?
HODGINS: A pig. And I don’t think he means a guinea pig. A real pig. Like a Mulefoot, Saddleback, or pot belly.
B&B are back out in the field. They realize there are fresh victims while Epps was locked up.
BOOTH: You know, you remember when I was nice to her and you weren’t? This is why.
B&B found out there is a missing nun. They search for clues then visit Epps again.
EPPS: Did you hear? I’m gonna be a father. The judge granted our petition for artificial insemination. (turns to Brennan, looking mildly smug) When I make my donation to the baby bank, I’m gonna be thinking about you.
BRENNAN: For all your … faults, Mr. Epps, you were never interested in letting your victims suffer. You didn’t torture them. You’re not that kind of man. She’s an innocent child.
EPPS: She’s a young woman … and there’s no such thing as an innocent woman. Look within yourself. You know I’m right. You know, I’m just guessing here, you understand, but I think you’ll find that Helen Majors has less than 24 hours to live. Better get going.
Angela and Brennan talk.
ANGELA: What are you asking me for?
BRENNAN: You said you’ve dealt with manipulative men before.
ANGELA: Sweetie, this is a psycho killer, not some loser who wants you to cosign a loan for his Jet Ski.
BRENNAN: Epps is pushing me around, Ange. He’s in control. I hate that.
ANGELA: You know; Epps is acting kind of like a boyfriend.
ANGELA: Well, you obviously fascinate him. He can’t have you, and he can’t kill you. So … he wants to make you hate yourself.
BRENNAN: God, Ange. What kind of boyfriends have you had?
ANGELA: Let’s keep the focus on you and Epps, okay?
ANGELA: Epps knows that you’ll never forgive yourself if you don’t find Helen Majors before she’s murdered.
BRENNAN: Not only is Helen being tortured, but … her family must be in agony.
ANGELA: You see? This is what he’s doing. He’s putting pictures in your mind. He’s messing with your objectivity.
BRENNAN: There’s nothing I can do about that.
ANGELA: You have to step back, okay? Let the rest of us deal with the families. You find Helen. That’ll keep Epps from … getting a Jet Ski outta you.
While Brennan emotionally struggles with the case, Booth brings in female reinforcements.
BOOTH: Caroline Epps. She knows something. She just won’t talk to me.
BOOTH: I’m a man, last time I checked.
CAM: But she’ll talk to a woman?
BOOTH: That’s my thinking.
CAM: Fine. I’ll do it.
BOOTH: Oh, no. You can’t sarcasm it out of her. You have to connect.
CAM: You don’t wanna send Brennan?
BOOTH: No – Angela.
CAM: Angela’s an artist, an expert in 3-D reconstruction.
BOOTH: Well, unlike you and Bones, Angela is, uh –
BOOTH: She’s better with the living than she is the dead.
Off to the Royal Diner..
ANGELA: Thanks for coming.
CAROLINE: I’ve told your people everything I know. I don’t see the point of this.
ANGELA: I know this is disturbing. I find it very upsetting, and I’m … not married to the man who did it.
CAROLINE: I love Howard, Miss Montenegro.
ANGELA: I believe you.
CAROLINE: No one’s ever said that to me.
ANGELA: I think you’d have to love him very much … to be willing to overlook what he’s done.
CAROLINE: Done in the past.
ANGELA: The thing is, we’re not so sure that it was in the past. For Howard, it’s obvious what he likes. Blonde girls.
CAROLINE: Not me, you mean.
ANGELA: Men can’t hide what they like. For Howard, it’s this.
CAROLINE: Men can change what they look at.
ANGELA: Does Howard ever just look at you – as though you just feel his eyes adoring you?
CAROLINE: He – he asks for magazines, DVDs. He’s – he’s very specific.
ANGELA: He likes blonde girls.
CAROLINE: Always the blonde girls. M-maybe if I – if I dyed my hair –
ANGELA: I’m sorry. I have to ask you something … Have you ever delivered any messages for Howard?
CAROLINE: Don’t you miss them?
ANGELA: I’m sorry?
CAROLINE: I wrote the message “Don’t you miss them?” on a – on a – on a piece of paper, and slipped it into a mailbox.
ANGELA: Whose mailbox?
CAROLINE: Um, a man named Henry Gerber who Howard knew from prison. Howard calls Henry “The Mad German.”
ANGELA: When did you deliver the message?
CAROLINE: F – five days ago.
ANGELA: Thank you.
CAROLINE: C – Can – can – will you sit with me … just a moment longer?
ANGELA: I’m – I have to make a phone call. You understand? But after that, I’ll sit with you … as long as you like.
They finally find the accomplice and his house.
BOOTH: God. I hate the serial killer wall of death.
B&B go out to find the last victim, who may still be alive.
BOOTH: All right. (gives Brennan a gun) Here.
BRENNAN: I didn’t even have to ask!
BOOTH: Yeah, well, just be careful, all right? Don’t shoot me. Don’t shoot Helen Majors. Otherwise –
They find the victim, alive.
The killer and Booth engage, but Brennan ends up shooting the killer.
BRENNAN: I had to shoot him.
BOOTH: Yeah. I’m glad you did.
Back to Epps.
EPPS: Lappin’s dead?
BOOTH: Shot resisting arrest.
EPPS: Who shot him?
EPPS: It was you, wasn’t it? You shot him? Did he take long to die? Did he suffer? This is better than I hoped. I thought it would be you. How did it feel? Dirty, yes? But there’s also a rush. Pleasure. Part of you liked it.
BRENNAN: This whole game was to have us kill someone?
EPPS: Who’s gonna tell Lappin’s mom? She loves him very much, you know. Without her son, she’ll be completely alone in this sad world.
BOOTH: We’re done with you. You’re never gonna see us again. Come on.
EPPS: I’m pretty sure you’re wrong about that, Agent Booth.
Time for a post-case wrap up.
BRENNAN: It’s water. But it’s – on the rocks.
BOOTH: You know, Bones, I’m not sure you grasp the basic theory on how to get drunk. Hey…what you need to do is order a shot of hard liquor … from a bartender named Shaky…And tell him to, uh, leave the bottle on the bar…
BRENNAN: I’m fine, Booth. I’m sitting here thinking about it, and … I’m fine.
BOOTH: Okay. So what I’m gettin’ from you here, Bones, is that you’re fine.
BRENNAN: He murdered Sarah. He was about to murder Helen. You know, why should I feel upset about shooting him? You know, I mean, if I was going to be upset, which I’m not … it would be because Epps thinks he beat us, so –
BOOTH: He didn’t.
BRENNAN: I know.
BOOTH: You’re upset because you think he beat us. You know what? He did.
BRENNAN: Beat us?
BRENNAN: Well, you just said that he didn’t.
BOOTH: Well, I changed my mind.
BRENNAN: What, in the last three seconds?
BOOTH: You know, you’re afraid that Epps turned you into him – into a killer. You have to come to grips with the fact that you killed another human being. Because when you kill someone, you know, there’s a cost. It’s a steep cost. I know. I’ve done it.
BRENNAN: I did the right thing.
BOOTH: I know. I was there.
BOOTH: I got something for ya.
BRENNAN: A bottle of hard liquor?
BOOTH: Hmm? Meet … Jasper.
BOOTH: You’re gonna be okay.