The Man in the Cell (2×12)

Written By: Noah Hawley

Directed by: Jesús Salvador Treviño

BOOTH:  It’s Booth.  I need you to close off a 30 mile radius of the Bayview Federal Penitentiary.  Howard Epps escaped.

The squints are reading about themselves in a newspaper article. Zach says that Hodgins looks short.

ANGELA:  Did you really call me “the heart of the operation?

HODGINS:  Yeah.  It was before you called me short.

ANGELA:  Hey, Zack called you short.  I think you’re just the right height.

HODGINS:  Yeah?

ANGELA:  Short men have better leverage?

ZACK:  I’m feeling uncomfortable.

LOL

B&B interview Epps’ wife who refuses police protection.

BRENNAN:  What– You can’t let her go!  She’s not safe!

BOOTH:  Well, I can’t force her to take protection, alright?  I’ll have the local police drive her house every couple of hours and make sure she’s safe.  And you know what?  You’re not safe either.

BRENNAN:  But I’m not unhinged.  I can take care of myself.

BOOTH:  You and Epps– Okay, it’s personal.  You’re everything that he hates.

BRENNAN:  And what is that exactly?

BOOTH:  Well, you know, you’re a smart, strong, confident woman. And, uh, figured him out.  You made him feel powerless so he’s gonna want to, uh, prove that, uh, you’re weak and inferior.  So, you are not to go out on your own, ever.

Booth beefs up security at the lab.

CAM:  You think Epps is gonna come after Brennan?

BOOTH:  I can’t rule anything out when it comes to Epps.

CAM:  I’ll take care of it.

BOOTH:  Look, I-I don’t want you to be alone either.

CAM:  Are you inviting me over?

BOOTH:  I’m just thinking that everyone should just stay here at the lab.

Backs away from that quickly doesn’t he? LOL

Angela and Brennan talk about what to do.

ANGELA:  How do you deal with the fear?

BRENNAN:  I . . . have this.

ANGELA:  Oh, my God.  That– That thing is huge.  Whoa, wow.  That’s like, movie huge.

BOOTH:  Where the hell did you get that?

BRENNAN:  The mall.

BOOTH:  The mall?

BRENNAN:  Yeah, it’s pretty big, right?  Bigger than the one you have.

BOOTH:  Excuse me.  It’s not the size that matters.  It’s how you use it.

BRENNAN:  Well, I think size is pretty important.

BOOTH:  The point is that you shouldn’t have a gun in the first place!

ANGELA:  If you do have one, bigger is always better.

BOOTH:  You’re not helping!

ANGELA:  Right, yeah.  This does seem like a private conversation.

So much double meaning here!

Epps calls Brennan and then gets busy, sending Angela a human heart.

BRENNAN:  He’s coming after me through my friends.

CAM:  What?

BRENNAN:  He told me whatever happened would be my fault.

CAM: Then we’ll make sure nothing else happens.

B&B realize Epps left them a clue and find his wife’s head.

CAM:  I’m seeing some kind of white powder in her hair.  Hodgins can tell us what it is.  Why just leave her head?

BOOTH:  To get us all involved.  I mean, the less we have to work with, the- the more we’re all drawn in.

BRENNAN:  Epps told me to use my head.

BOOTH:  Everything he says is a clue.  Could it be inside the head?

CAM:  It’s too early to tell. Okay.  That’s terrifically disturbing.

BOOTH:  What?

CAM:  Massive blood aspiration to the soft tissue of the neck.

BOOTH:  Meaning?

CAM:  Caroline Epps was alive when Howard cut her head off.

BRENNAN:  Now he’s torturing his victims.

BOOTH:  So let’s torture him.

BRENNAN:  How?

BOOTH:  Bring his mother in.

CAM:  I thought Epps hated his mother.

BOOTH:  His FBI profiler believes he was emotionally attached to her.  His prison logs show that he wrote to her almost every day.

CAM:  Well that’s sick.

BOOTH:  But helpful.  I mean, if he feels responsible for his mother being in jail we can knock him off his game.

B&B visit Epps’ mother.

BRENNAN:  You’re son murdered his wife yesterday, beheaded her.

MRS. EPPS:  And you want to blame me?

BRENNAN:  You made your son bathe in ammonia.

MRS. EPPS:  The women he would go out with, they were loose.  Not the right kind for a God-fearing son! Wanted him to wash their scent off.

BOOTH:  Is there anything else that you can tell us that might help us find your son before he kills again?

MRS. EPPS:  It’s not my fault what he did.

BOOTH:  Yeah.  Okay.  Um, that’s all for now.  We’ll have an agent escort you back to your cell.  Um, of course you have the right to an attorney.

MRS. EPPS:  I should’ve been harder on him, beat him more regular.  I’m a nice person.  Too nice.  That was my problem.  Too nice.

Yeah, she was too nice. That’s it.

Booth attempts to explain to Brennan that this all is not her fault. Cam calls.

CAM:  Something was inserted in Caroline’s ear.  Epps made an incision in Caroline’s left ear canal, inserted a token for a kid’s ride from a place called Hillside Park.

BOOTH:  Oh, God.  My son plays there every day after school.

MAN:  Here you go.

BOOTH:  Parker comes here every day at 4 with his nanny.  Rose!  Rose, where’s Parker?

ROSE:  On the merry-go-round.  He was just there!

BOOTH:  Parker!  Parker!

BRENNAN:  Parker!

ROSE:  Parker!

BRENNAN:  Over there.

BOOTH:  Parker.  Parker!  Parker!

PARKER:  Daddy!

BOOTH:  Hey.  Oh, God.  Alright.

PARKER:  Look.  A man bought me ice cream.

BOOTH:  Alright.  Alright.

PARKER:  That was my favorite.

BOOTH:  I’ll buy you another one, okay?  Just listen to me.  What did this man look like?

PARKER:  A man.  He said he was your friend.

BOOTH:  What did he say to you?  Did he say anything else to you, Parker?

PARKER:  To use my napkin.

BRENNAN:  Booth.  “My name is Parker.  Ask me how I can solve this case.”  Alright.  What else did he tell you?

PARKER:  Nothing.  He was just nice.

BOOTH:  Okay.  Just listen to me, Parker.  Alright?  This man is trying to hurt Daddy’s friends, okay?  So I need you to think.  What else did he say to you?

PARKER:  I didn’t do anything wrong.  He said he was your friend.

BOOTH:  You never talk to strangers, okay?!  You never!  I’m sorry, buddy.  It’s okay.  Alright?  I’m sorry.

Booth pushes for Cam to skip protocol.

BOOTH: Have you opened the head yet?

CAM:  I just finished telling Zack . . .

BOOTH:  Listen, Epps just went after my kid, Cam.

CAM:  Parker.

BOOTH:  You know there’s something there.  He told us.  It’s something we need.  He wants us to find it.

CAM:  Get me the number two saw. I found some bruising to the back of her head.  I’m gonna cut below it so I don’t disturb the area.

ZACK:  I hate this part.

CAM:  Me too.

ZACK:  Dr. Saroyan.

CAM:  Protocol.

ZACK:  Biological containment.  Uh-unknown hazardous material.  We need an emergency medical team at the autopsy lab ASAP.

The team scrambles to find out what happened. Brennan attempts to empathize.

BRENNAN:  Considering the relationship between you and Cam, I’d like to say the right thing, Booth . . . I don’t know what it is.  Usually I’d-I’d ask you or Angela.

BOOTH:  You just said it.  Thanks.

Hodgins and Zach work but disagree.

 

HODGINS:  No particles on her clothing.  Zack, it had to be a gas.

ZACK:  It wasn’t.  Are we having an argument?

HODGINS:  Of course.

ZACK:  Why?

HODGINS:  Because Cam’s dying, and I should be with Angela.  And because there are no particles.

ZACK:  On the clothing?

HODGINS:  That’s right.

ZACK:  What about the glass parts still left in the head?

HODGINS:  I’m not angry at you anymore.

Booth visits Cam.

 

BOOTH:  I’m- I’m . . .  I’m so sorry, you know, that I put so much pressure on you to hurry.  I didn’t, uh-

CAM:  Not your fault.  Epps did this to me.

BOOTH:  Hey.  Your family’s coming.

CAM:  Oh, God.  And I thought poison . . . was my biggest problem.

Epps calls to try to intimidate Brennan. It doesn’t work as he thinks. Brennan is too smart for him!

BRENNAN:  Now will you tell me the poison?

EPPS:  The body knows what the head can’t say.

BRENNAN:  Caroline’s body or your mother’s body?

EPPS:  My mother?

BRENNAN:  Yes.  We have her in custody.  Didn’t you know?

EPPS:  On what charges?

BRENNAN:  What poison, Howard?

EPPS:  You had no right.  My mother’s not part of this.

BRENNAN:  You tell me about the poison and I will tell you about your mother.

EPPS:  You don’t run the game.  I run the game.  You’re gonna be sorry.

Zack has an idea.

ZACK:  Booth?

BOOTH: What?

ZACK:  We’ve endowed Epps with intelligence he does not have.  His clues are unsophisticated word games.

BOOTH:  Yeah?

ZACK:  Uh, “my name is Parker.  Ask me how I can solve this case.”

BOOTH:  I already asked Parker.  He doesn’t know anything.

ZACK:  It doesn’t have to be your son.  It can be something else named Parker.  Something to do with leather goods or drywall.  Do a Boolean search.  Okay, right.  You don’t know what that is.  Boolean is . . . I won’t explain.  I’ll just do it.

BOOTH:  I am walking out of here.  You try and stop me again, I will shoot both of you.

ZACK:  Mmmm…  Ummm…

HODGINS:  What?

ZACK:  I really need him to come back.

HODGINS: BOOTH! Whatever you got better be worth dying for.

ZACK:  Uh, there’s a Parker & Parker Leather Goods owned by the Parker brothers on Parker Street in the town of Parker just outside of Arlington.  That’s a lot of Parkers.

BOOTH:  Yeah, okay.  Let’s go.

Zack gets booby trapped and Booth coaches him how to jump away.

FEMALE REPORTER:  The explosion occurred as FBI agents searched the shop for escaped serial killer Howard Epps.  At least one person was killed in the blast.  Dr. Zack Addy, a forensic anthropologist who was working with the FBI, died at the scene.  Special Agent Seeley Booth remains in critical condition.

BOOTH:  Chuckles.  Okay, that’s creepy.  Zack dead and me in critical condition, right?

ZACK:  But why?  It’s not true.

BRENNAN: You gonna be alright?

ZACK:  My doctor said most of my injuries didn’t come from the explosion but from being slammed into the floor.  Apparently, you’re extremely strong.

BRENNAN:  Did you have to be so rough on him?

BOOTH:  It was a bomb.  I was being, you know, heroic.

ZACK: I was heroic too.

BRENNAN:  Yes, you were.

BOOTH:  Somebody saved somebody.  That’s all I’m saying.

BOOTH:  I’m gonna go see Cam at the hospital. And you are gonna go home and get some sleep.

ZACK:  Why can’t I go home?

BOOTH:  Didn’t you just hear what they said on the news?  You’re dead.

BRENNAN:  What about Epps?

BOOTH:  I got an entire surveillance team outside your home, watching you.  Why does everybody question me, right?  I’m the hero.

Booth goes to Brennan’s apartment. Epps has gotten inside. Brennan was prepared for that with her gun.

BRENNAN:  You won’t let me shoot him, will you?

BOOTH:  You knew he was gonna be here, didn’t you?

BRENNAN:  It’s the only scenario that made sense.

BOOTH:  Oh.  What, you heading for the balcony, Howie?  Hope you can fly, cause that’s about a fifty foot drop, right?

BRENNAN:  Yeah.

EPPS:  How did you know?

BRENNAN:  Plaster dust in the poison.

BOOTH:  Renovations to the apartment next door.

BRENNAN:  You’re not all that smart, turns out.

EPPS:  One minute.  All I want is one minute alone with you.

BRENNAN:  Fine with me.

BOOTH:  Don’t provoke the lunatic, alright?  You got nowhere to go.

EPPS:  I’m not going back to jail.

BOOTH:  You see, that’s really not your decision, Howie.  Get your hands up.  Drop the crowbar.

BOOTH:  In the line of fire, Bones.  You’re not getting away, Howard.

EPPS:  Look who the killer is now, Agent Booth.

BOOTH:  A little help here, Bones?  I got nothing but dead weight here.  Help me.

BRENNAN:  Sorry.  Can’t reach.

BOOTH:  Grab the railing.

EPPS:  You’re gonna drop me anyway.  Just get it over with.

BOOTH:  You son of a bitch.

EPPS:  Are you saying you don’t want me dead?

BOOTH:  Yeah, I’m not you.

EPPS:  Oh, really?  You’re not thinking of the world with me still in it?  Going after Dr. Brennan, your son-

BOOTH:  I’m not you.

AGENT #1:  Unit on the ground saw what happened.  So did the sniper across the street.  You tried to save him.

BOOTH:  Yep.

BRENNAN:  No one could’ve helped him.

BOOTH:  Yeah.

AGENT #1:  You can take off now, Booth.  Department might want to assign you a shrink- on the job death like that.

BRENNAN:  You didn’t have your full strength.  Your wrist was hurt from pulling Zack away from the explosion.

BOOTH:  My wrist wasn’t hurt, Bones.

BRENNAN: I wish you’d let me shoot him.

BOOTH:  No, you don’t.

Brennan finds Booth at the park.

BOOTH: Hi.  How’d you know I was here?

BRENNAN:  Saturday morning.  How’s Parker?

BOOTH:  Yeah, I’m afraid I freaked him out the other day.  He’s really scared of this place.  Now I gotta put that right.

BRENNAN:  That’s you all over- putting things right.  Cam gets released from the hospital today?

BOOTH:  Yeah.

BRENNAN:  What?

BOOTH:  You know, what happened to Cam happened because . . . we had a personal relationship.

BRENNAN:  Had?

BOOTH:  Yeah.  People who work in . . . high-risk situations they can’t be involved romantically because it leads to things like what happened.

BRENNAN:  High-risk situations.

BOOTH:  Every single day it’s with us.  There’s this line, and we can’t cross it.  You know what I’m saying?

BRENNAN:  Yes.  I understand. He seems okay now.

BOOTH:  Yeah, you know, it’s important to make things right.  I just don’t know how.  I don’t know how.

**I know, I know**

Pic of the day 2-19

So I’m reading one of those Buzzfeed lists today and found something that reminded me of Caroline! It’s a list of slang words from each state:  https://www.buzzfeed.com/caseyrackham/this-is-what-slang-word-your-state-is-known-for?bftw&utm_term=.bwvAdV0lRA#.syMRkDYqzR

And Louisiana’s happens to be…

 

Awwww! Booth is a cute baby!

Bonus: what does Buzzfeed say your state’s slang word is? Apparently my state members are the only ones who call vacuum cleaners “sweepers”!! Lol

In Appreciation of Seeley Booth

In Appreciation of Seeley Booth

So, I think we all need a little pick-me-up. The world is tough out there. But we can at least think on the positives out there, and that is the awesomeness of this guy right here.

Please click on the link above. The website is “Head Over Heels”, and they pretty much get our favorite FBI agent.

Their intro: “Seeley Joseph Booth. My TV Crushes come and they go, but Booth remains a constant. He’s THAT guy, you know? He’s the Alpha Male who is a gigantic mushball. He believes in romance and fate and soulmates. He laughs at fart jokes and sexual innuendo. He’s dark and twisty and wrestles with his own demons. He loves strong and intelligent women who challenge him. He’s just…SO MUCH. And there are very few leading men on TV that are as well-rounded as he is, so let’s appreciate him, shall we?  — Kim”

Read and discuss! Love all my Bones pals out there! 🙂

Judas on a Pole (2×11)

Written By: Hart Hanson

Directed by: David Duchovny

Zack is in the middle of a presentation, but there are other pressing matters. Enter Booth.

BOOTH: Hey, Bones. Come on. We’ve got a body, went up like a roman candle. Hey, Zack! How’s it going?

ZACK: So far, they don’t like me.

BOOTH: Shocker. Come on. Let’s go.

Brennan and Booth check out the body.

BRENNAN: Male. Middle – aged.

BOOTH: What was with Zack back there?

BRENNAN: Defending his dissertation, last step before he gets his Doctorate. I think these are what’s left of his intestines.

BOOTH: Is he gonna make it?

BRENNAN: No. He’s very dead.

BOOTH: I mean Zack.

BRENNAN: Uhh. 50/50.

BOOTH: He’s a stoolie.

BRENNAN: Zack?

BOOTH: Our victim. Ya know, he’s a rat. Snitch.

BRENNAN: What makes you say that?

BOOTH: His guts got spilled. Alright, Spill your guts.

BRENNAN: Very literal.

BOOTH: Yeah. Hang up there like a scarecrow on a rooftop of a hotel used to house witnesses, it’s a warning.

BRENNAN: Oh look.  There’s something jammed down his trachea.

The squints look over the body.

CAM: There’s something metallic here. This is going to turn out to be some freaky, weird ritualistic thing, isn’t it?

HODGINS: Oh man, I hope so.

Meanwhile, Russ is in town.

BRENNAN: Dad called you? You sure it was him.

RUSS: He said “You and your sister are in danger” and he hung up.

BRENNAN: I spend half my time with a sniper-trained FBI Agent. I feel safe.

RUSS: Tempe. I know someone is watching me.

BRENNAN: What’s your evidence?

RUSS: I can feel it on the back of my neck. You spend some time in jail, you develop a sixth sense.

BRENNAN: Maybe you should stay with me for a few days.

RUSS: No, Tempe. I have work and I have, I have Amy and the girls…

BRENNAN: What about your sixth sense?

RUSS: Hey!

BRENNAN: What?

RUSS: You can’t not believe in something one second and then use it against me in the next.

BRENNAN: It’s a long drive. You can start fresh tomorrow and I’ve got cold beer in the fridge.

(Booth enters)

BOOTH: No, Don’t drink the Moroccan Beer, it tastes like earwax…how you doing, Russ?

RUSS: Okay Booth. You? Good.

BOOTH: Yeah.

RUSS: Good.

BOOTH: I still make him nervous, don’t I? Come on, let’s go.

BRENNAN: Wha…What? Why do I always feel like you’re abducting me?

BOOTH: Yeah, it turns out our corpse is a former FBI Agent.

Booth and the squints talk over a possible conspiracy regarding an old case.

BOOTH: Great. Who else knows about this?

HODGINS: Us and you. That’s it.

BOOTH: Let’s keep it that way.

HODGINS: I’ve seen this movie. I get killed on the way home.

BOOTH: Then don’t go home.

HODGINS: You serious?

Brennan realizes how this case connects with her family.

BRENNAN: My parents robbed that exact bank just days after Gus Harper was killed. They were looking for that evidence. That has to be why Delaney was stalking Russ.

BOOTH: You go home and you be with your brother, alright?

Brennan and Russ talk. Brennan realizes their dad is involved.

BRENNAN: Columbus – shot a man in the head, hung him from a pole, gutted him and set him on fire. And Columbus – is our father.

RUSS: Dad had it under control. I mean, for 15 years, everything was fine – until…

BRENNAN: Until what?

RUSS: Dad left you a message, he said stop looking. You didn’t.

BRENNAN: Uh. So this is my fault?

RUSS: Well, consequences aren’t the same as fault. My parole officer if very philosophical.

BRENNAN: Well, all we have is a voice tape of Dad saying “Back Off” and a little silver dolphin that I found at Mom’s grave. That’s as far as the investigation has gone.

RUSS: According to Booth.

BRENNAN: What? Booth and I are partners.

RUSS: Tempe. He’s FBI. You aren’t. You’re the daughter of a career criminal and the sister of a loser on parole.

BRENNAN: What? I wouldn’t let anyone else call you a loser, Russ. What makes you think you’re allowed?

RUSS: I love you too.

Enter Caroline!!

CAROLINE JULIAN: What you’re asking is the kinda thing that destroys careers. From the time I was a little girl, I dreamed of putting bad men in jail (Booth steals a donut hole) Put that back – which is why I became an Assistant United States Attorney.

BOOTH: Okay, look, you don’t have to help me…

CAROLINE: Of course I have to help you. Marvin Beckett is still a hero to a lot of African Americans. Some of us never believed he killed this FBI boy. Now you buy me breakfast, tell me you found a way to clear his name, release him out of wrongful incarceration after 30 years? I cannot walk away – which you already know.

BOOTH:  Maybe you should have some more coffee…

CAROLINE: Of course I want more coffee. We have to come up with our plan of attack.

BOOTH: Okay, Well I was thinking Judge Moran.

CAROLINE: We should exhume Gus Harper. See if your genius, scientist partner, can ascertain whether he died in the manner the FBI said he died 30 years ago.

BOOTH:  Moran’s got a long….

CAROLINE: No. We want Kemper.

BOOTH: Hang ‘em high, Kemper?

CAROLINE: Hey. I’m ruining my career, I’m doing it my way. Understand? Now. Take a donut hole. I’m offering.

BOOTH: Thanks.

Brennan gets a visitor.

RUSS: Tempe. This is a friend of dad’s. Father Coulter. It’s Toby Coulter. Train trestle guy.

BRENNAN: Ah, yeah. I remember that story, when dad and his friend accidentally blew up a train trestle.

BOOTH: Come on. How do you “accidentally” blow up a train trestle?

FATHER COULTER: Well, we were hired by a farmer to dynamite the ice off a stock pond. Anyway, we get this competition going – who’s gonna slide the dynamite farther across the ice before it blows.

BOOTH: You know it’s a Federal offense to blow up a train trestle, Father, even if it is accidental.

BRENNAN: Father Toby Coulter. Meet my partner, Seeley Booth.

RUSS: Careful, he’s FBI.

FATHER COULTER: Well, I’m innocent. It was Max’s toss that, uh, brought the trestle down.

BOOTH: Max Keenan’s best friend grows up to be a priest.

FATHER COULTER: I’m sure your people have that fact on file somewhere.

RUSS: Tempe, Father Coulter has a message from Dad.

FATHER COULTER: It’s a private message. “Back off.” That’s the message. He’d said you’d understand.

BOOTH: When’d you see him?

FATHER COULTER: In confession.

BRENNAN: We’re not Catholic.

BOOTH: Well, the sanctity of confession is extended to all. Um, did he ever call you on your cell phone, Father?

FATHER COULTER: Two days ago.

BOOTH: Can I see your phone?

FATHER COULTER: You wanna trace the call?

BOOTH: Yeah. So uh, Max Keenan. He, uh, come to you for absolution?

FATHER COULTER: Well, I’m sure you know the requirements for confession.

BOOTH: Contrition and intent – not to repeat the sin.

FATHER COULTER: Your father loves you.

BRENNAN: Is that part of Dad’s message?

FATHER COULTER: That’s a personal observation.

Booth and Brennan discuss.

BRENNAN: You must be annoyed.

BOOTH: Yeah. Ya know what? I am. And I don’t like finding out there’s a dirty FBI Agent in this building. Here’s what I think happened. Delaney goes to your Father; he asks him to hand over the evidence. He doesn’t do it; he kills you or Russ.

BRENNAN: Dad calls Russ to warn him…and then…kills Delaney.

BOOTH: Guts him, burns him. Leaves a calling card. “Don’t mess with Max Keenan’s kids”

BRENNAN: Am I supposed to like that?

BOOTH: Ya know, Bones. I’ll take a stand up crook over a crooked cop  any day of the week.

CAROLINE: Booth. I got us a meet with the judge, let’s go. And you get back to your lab, in case we’re successful.

BOOTH: Ya know. I find it best to do what she says.

Don’t we all, Booth! Caroline and Booth ask permission to exhume the body in the old case.

BURRIDGE: The FBI would like to do their own, in house analysis before proceeding.

CAROLINE: Of course they would. They’re the ones that did the framin’ 30 years ago

BURRIDGE: I take exception to that.

CAROLINE: Why? You weren’t even born 30 years ago.

BURRIDGE: Judge…

CAROLINE: Not like me and Judge Kemper who got to see firsthand what Marvin Beckett was really like.

KEMPER: Ms. Julian, did you bring this to me because I knew Marvin Beckett personally?

CAROLINE: Did you? I – I wasn’t aware of that, Your Honor. We’re you aware of that Agent Booth?

Caroline is just the best ever.

Booth and Russ meet up at the diner.

BOOTH: Russ.

RUSS: Okay. I’m here. What’s up?

BOOTH: You know, you’re an idiot, Russ. I like you but – you’re a real idiot.

RUSS: What’d I do?

BOOTH: I got a call from your parole officer today.

RUSS: Why?

BOOTH: Why? Because you crossed state lines without informing him. I just told him you were aiding in an FBI investigation.

RUSS: Thanks.

BOOTH: You’re slipping, aren’t ya?

RUSS: Look. I wanna marry Amy and raise her kids. One of them is sick, that costs money. I’m a felon on parole, I work part-time as a mechanic. You tell me what job am I gonna get that lets me be the man I need to be to raise a family.

BOOTH: You got this sick little girl depending on you, I get that. But you go back inside and you cross that line, you’re not helping anyone out–

BOOTH: Everybody down!

Booth and Brennan discuss the shooting.

BRENNAN: Lucky you were together. Why were you together?

BOOTH: Oh, ya know. A man’s gotta eat.

Booth gets suspended.

BRENNAN: Can they do that? Just kick you out without any warning?

BOOTH: Well, the two guys standing behind me, with the guns, seemed to think so.

ZACK: As you can see, Harper’s ribs and sternum were practically obliterated by the two shots to his torso.

ANGELA: Zack, Booth got fired.

BRENNAN: Suspended, not fired.

CAM: Suspended is FBI speak for fired.

BOOTH: Ah. You know what hurts the most?  They took the car. Got no wheels.

ZACK: The bullets themselves, removed from the body – of course, but Hodgins found some very small fragments –

HODGINS: Copper, lead, polymer. This is a conspiracy, baby.

CAM: Guys. What we’re dealing with here is that – Booth – won’t be working with us anymore.

BOOTH: Well, I got my own gun, it’s just – god, why did they have to take the company car….

ZACK: I assume the only way Booth can get his car back, would be to solve the case on his own and that we’d help.

BOOTH: Oh, no. No, no. I can’t let you guys do that.

BRENNAN: Anyone that wants to help Booth, raise their hands.

They all raise their hands.  Booth is touched!

Aw, they’re Booth’s people after all!

B&B speak with “Father Coulter”.

BOOTH: Guess you being a priest didn’t have much of an effect on him.

FATHER COULTER: Son, I spent my whole life trying to turn Max’s life to Jesus. He knows exactly one Bible verse. Numbers 35:19.

BOOTH: “The revenger of blood himself shall slay the murderer. When he meeteth him, he shall slay him”.

**NIV Version of the Bible: The avenger of blood shall put the murderer to death; when the avenger comes upon the murderer, the avenger shall put the murderer to death.**

BRENNAN: What’s that mean?

BOOTH: That’s the Law of the Jungle.

BRENNAN: Father Coulter, if my father makes contact with you again, please tell him he needs to trust me. His way got my mother murdered and almost got Russ killed. It’s time he tried my way.

B&B talk.

BOOTH: Why are ya mad at me?

BRENNAN: I need a gun.

BOOTH: No, you don’t. You got me. I’m your gun.

*Motile sperm count: 28.8 million. I could start my own country.* 

BOOTH: You want equipment, here have these, alright. New division of labor. I shoot ‘em, you cuff ‘em.

BRENNAN: Why didn’t you tell me you had Father Coulter under surveillance?

BOOTH: It is my job to find your dad and put him in prison.

BRENNAN: And you don’t think I’ll help?

BOOTH: What? He’s your father. I really don’t think I should have to ask you to help.

BRENNAN: He abandoned me, Booth. And that’s the best thing you can say about him.

BOOTH: Your father lives by a certain code, and part of that code is defending his family by whatever means necessary.

BRENNAN: You mean killing people and setting their corpses on fire.

BOOTH: Any means necessary sorta covers that.

BRENNAN: You respect him?

BOOTH: I’m just saying, in his world, he’s a very honorable man.

BRENNAN: That’s ridiculous. There’s only one world; it’s this one.

BOOTH: Would that be the one world where you’re mad at me for trying to catch your father or the other world where you actually want him caught?

BRENNAN: Neither.

BOOTH: Well, you have to pick one.

Russ is in danger. B&B race to Brennan’s house. Brennan sees a pool of blood.

BRENNAN: Russ? Oh, my god. Booth?

BOOTH: What?

BRENNAN: Russ.

BOOTH: Alright, just take it easy. Alright, we don’t know that for sure.

BRENNAN: That’s too much blood. Nobody could survive tha- that much blood loss. Nobody.

BOOTH: Alright. Okay. It’s alright.

BRENNAN: Oh my god.

BRENNAN: That had to be Russ’s blood.

BOOTH: You got a sample, right? We’ll check the DNA at the lab. Until then, hey –  who’s the one that always says ‘don’t jump to conclusions’?

BRENNAN: Yeah, you’re right. Thanks. I wish you wouldn’t keep letting me hug you when I get scared.

BOOTH: Hey, I get scared and I’ll hug you. We’ll call it even.

I’ll take that deal, Booth!

Brennan meets with the priest.

FATHER COULTER: Well, first, I want to tell you that your brother, is uh, with his father.

BRENNAN: You mean with God?

FATHER COULTER: No, his earthly father. Your father.

BRENNAN: Are you certain?

FATHER COULTER: Saw it with my own eyes.

BRENNAN: Oh, thank god – which I use only as a figure of speech.

FATHER COULTER: Well, I mean, you have to start somewhere. You know, you’re – you’re very much like him.

BRENNAN: I’m – nothing like my father.

FATHER COULTER: Black and white, the two of you. You always saw the world in black and white. Your mother wasn’t like that, neither is Russell.

Brennan figures it out.

FATHER COULTER: Wham! You took that doll and you wound up and you hit your brother so hard you knocked him flat as a pancake. I said to your mother, “No one, no one will ever jump out at that girl again.” And your mother said, “just like you Max. She’s just like you”

BRENNAN: Hair color…plastic surgery…colored contact lenses, chin and cheek implants…fifteen years older. Still…I should have seen it.

BRENNAN: Russ knew it was you all along?

MAX: Yeah.

BRENNAN: You talk to Russ, but not to me?

MAX: You know. To tell you the truth, you do – you do better without me and Russ does worse. Take this.

Russ arrives.

RUSS: Dad! Come on.

MAX: I gotta go.

BRENNAN: Wait. I can’t let you go.

MAX: Oh, I love you too.

BRENNAN: No. I mean I can’t let you go. I’m sorry.

MAX: Ooh. I must be getting old. I let you get the drop on me.

BRENNAN: I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I just can’t let you get away.

MAX: I’m sorry. Listen to me. If you find somebody that you can trust, you hang on to ‘em. Remember that.

RUSS: Dad! Let’s go!

MAX: I’m proud of you, I love you.

Booth arrives.

RUSS: Dad, get in.

MAX: You take care of her.

BOOTH: FBI. Stop or I’ll shoot.

BRENNAN: Booth!

BOOTH: You okay?

Booth follows up with Brennan at a celebration for Zack getting officially hired.

BRENNAN: What happened?

BOOTH: Uh, the uh, Attorney general took one look at the uh, evidence your father provided and you know, he reinstated me.

BRENNAN: I’m glad.

BOOTH: Listen, we uh, found another burned body. Same place, same setup.

BRENNAN: Kirby?

BOOTH: I’m pretty sure it was Kirby’s blood in your apartment.

BRENNAN: Dad’s still trying to warn people – “leave me and Russ alone”.

BOOTH: No, Russ…he’s safe with your father. They’re warning people to stay away from you. You know what? I’m sorry…that you had to go through it again. Watching your family drive off, leaving you behind. I’m sorry.

BRENNAN: My Father is, is—

BOOTH: He’s your dad, and he loves you.

BRENNAN: Ya know. I’m just…I’m just one of those people who doesn’t get to be in a family. That’s —

Again, it’s just not fair how gorgeous she is!!

BOOTH: Listen, Bones, hey. There’s more than one kind of family… Well, hell, Zack got the job, right?

BRENNAN: Come in and congratulate him.

BOOTH: Nah, you know he’s your squints, not my squints.

BRENNAN: No, Booth…we are all of us, your squints.

And once more, for the road…

 

Thoughts? I must confess, I was conflicted about Max in the early days. I was mad that he was involved in crime in the first place, I was mad he abandoned his kids, I was mad that Brennan learned he stayed in contact with Russ only. I, like Brennan, didn’t think murdering people was a loving gesture.  What do you all think about it if you were in Brennan’s shoes?

 

The Headless Witch in the Woods (2×10)

“The Headless Witch in the Woods”

Written by: Karine Rosenthal & Stephen Nathan

Directed by: Tony Wharmby

Booth and Brennan are taken to the woods to look at a body. The park ranger tells them about a legend of a ghost that cuts people’s heads off. Brennan has the body sent to the lab.

BOOTH: I checked missing persons. A film student from UVA went missing in the woods last year. He was making a documentary on the Maggie Cinders legend. Graham Hastings, 21, 5’10”, 176 pounds.

CAM: That explains the video camera.

ANGELA: I, um, I got something from the videotape.

LORI: Where’s Brian?! Where’s Brian!

GRAHAM: Lori, wait where are you going? Lori, stop! Stop, Lori!

LORI: Brian! Bri-!

Brennan notices Cam grab Booth’s band as they watch. Don’t think she likes it.

GRAHAM: Oh, God. The noises are getting closer. I’ve lost Lori and Brian disappeared. Oh God. It’s her. I can hear her. She’s here. She’s here! Oh God, she’s here! Lori, where the hell are you?! Lori! Oh my God. Help! Help me, oh God! Oh God, somebody help me! Somebody help me, please!

_____________

CAM: Victim’s preliminary tox screen came back negative. No drugs.

HODGINS: That’s too bad.

CAM: Why?

HODGINS: Because drugs would explain the writings I found inside Graham’s backpack. I’m cleaning them and taking mud samples, but I think Booth should show them to a profiler. They’re handwritten, scrawled. So far all I can make out is: “Maggie came to me again, calling me“.  And last but not least, “They will scream for air, but their lungs will fill with blood.“

CAM: I’ll – redo the tox screen.

BRENNAN: I may be alone in this, but I think one of us should remain a rational human being during this investigation. Got it. Comminuted fracture to the ulna, professionally set.

ZACK: From the degree of callous formation, that’s a childhood injury.

BRENNAN: One that could give us the ID we want. I’ll call Booth. Tell him to contact next of kin. Zack, place some garlic around the remains and chant the Hmong ritual for preservation of souls.

ZACK: Really?

BRENNAN: This is going to be a long case.

__________

CAM: Hacking off someone’s head is more like cutting down a small tree than splitting a log.

ZACK: I find your imagery both colorful and accurate.

CAM: Thank you. Let me know when you’ve narrowed down the weapon category.

ZACK: Dr. Saroyan? When you say your mother visited you…?

CAM: She appeared. In my room. It was early evening.

ZACK: And you were frightened?

CAM: No, I felt – loved.

ZACK: Dr. Brennan says that’s impossible.

CAM: What do you think?

ZACK: I think it would be wonderful if it were possible.

_______________

BRENNAN: I – I wonder what my life would have been like if Russ had raised me.

BOOTH: Well, you know, since he was a petty thief – you know, in and out of jail all the time – I’d – I’d imagine it wouldn’t have been very good.

BRENNAN: If he’d accepted responsibility for raising me – I’m romanticizing. It’s foolish.

BOOTH: Everyone does it, Bones, okay? It’s normal.

BRENNAN: It’s a useless fantasy, no different than the childish legend about the headless woman. I mean, look at Will. He sacrificed everything for his brother and still couldn’t save him. By walking out, maybe Russ gave me my life.

BOOTH: But you know what Will said, he was right. You turned out okay.

BRENNAN: I’m going to have coffee with him.

BOOTH: Mmm. That was quick.

BRENNAN: He understands something no one else I know does. People need connection, Booth. Even me. Obviously, you have one with Cam. So –

BOOTH: What?

BRENNAN: I thought you’d mention it. I mean, isn’t that what partners do? Tell each other about their lives?

BOOTH: Wait a second. Look, Bones, I-

BRENNAN: Sorry. I’m sorry. I forgot how self-conscious you are talking about sex.

BOOTH: I am not- I’m-

 

Haha, she got you, Booth!

Question: Did Brennan accept the date with Will BECAUSE she saw Cam grab Booth’s hand? Did she think if he can have a side thing I can? Maybe subconsciously?

Booth and Brennan interview the other people in the video.

BRENNAN: Well, I’ll ask Will what type of relationship Graham and Lori really had when I have coffee with him.

It is not fair how pretty Emily is. 

BOOTH: Whoa. Wait a second. You know, we’re investigating his brother’s death. I mean, don’t you think that can get a little messy?

BRENNAN: I can compartmentalize. Same as you.

Exhibit A

BOOTH: Mm.

Booth, she is all over it. Nice try, dude.

Brennan has coffee with Will and reports back to Booth.

BRENNAN: Lori was not Graham’s only girlfriend. He had lots of girlfriends, but he somehow managed to keep them secret from each other.

BOOTH: So what would happen if a very jealous Lori found out?

BRENNAN: I don’t know. That’s, that’s more your territory.

BOOTH: What? What? What, am I cheating?

Brennan: I just meant that you use psychology. You’re very touchy. Perhaps because of all your skulking around.

BOOTH: I am discreet, okay? It’s different. A gentleman is discreet, okay?

ZACK: What are we talking about?

BOOTH: Nothing that concerns you.

ZACK: But I’m quite literally in the middle of the conversation and it seems very interesting. However, your glaring indicates that I shouldn’t press for further information.

B&B continue to investigate. A second skull is found. B&B learn there is evidence hidden in the woods. Booth sends out a team.

BOOTH: Did you hear that, Lou? Yeah, south-southwest. Yeah, I know it gets cold when the sun goes down, Lou. Well, you should’ve brought your blankie. Alright, just call me when you find her clothes. Man. What? He was being a baby.

BRENNAN: I didn’t say anything.

BOOTH: But you’re looking at me like – I’m in trouble and you’re a teacher.

BRENNAN: You’re very touchy lately, Booth.

BOOTH: Look, Bones. I don’t know why I didn’t tell you about Cam.

BRENNAN: Did I mention Cam?

BOOTH: I just didn’t want it to get weird, I guess.

BRENNAN: Weird?

BOOTH: We’re partners, you know? Together all the time, right? You’re a woman and I’m a man and I never had a relationship like this where we were – like two guys, except you’re not – ya know – a guy. Yeah.

Gorgeously confused.

BRENNAN: No. No, I’m not. Should I feel odd about – wanting to hang out with Will?

BOOTH: No, of course not. You know, because essentially – I mean – you’re a guy like me. But not really.

BRENNAN: That would mean that, to me, you are essentially a woman. I can see that.

BOOTH: No, no, no. I’d – I’d prefer not to be a woman, if you don’t mind.

BRENNAN: I’m merely trying to follow your reasoning, Booth.

BOOTH: Okay, fine. What do you say we just, you know, we’ll drop it for now Yeah, it’s Booth. They found the clothes.

BRENNAN: That was fast.

BOOTH: Yeah, well, good work, Lou. All right, now you can come home before all the monsters get you. I- Hung up on me. I thought it was funny.

The team finds out a scene was staged in the woods to help kill the victim with a stolen skull and cow’s blood at the scene.

Brennan meets up with the victim’s brother again. She spills all.

WILL: The teacher killed Graham for a script?

BRENNAN: Make his career. Brian’s, too. I’ve seen people murdered for a lot less. Uh, it’s not certain yet. We’re just looking for evidence that links one or two of them to the remains.

WILL: With all this going on, when I’m with you – I feel like everything’s gonna be okay.

BRENNAN: I’d like to see the world the way you do.

WILL: Then you would be looking at a very beautiful woman.

Booth and the squints realize that the evidence is pointing to the victim’s brother.

BOOTH: Wait, Graham’s brother. He’s a firefighter.

ANGELA: He’s also about six-foot-one, right? And, he has a head.

CAM: That explains why it looks like there was only one blood source. Siblings share so many of the same chromosomes.

BOOTH: Will Hastings killed his brother.

CAM: That certainly explains my result.

BOOTH: Brennan. Wait, she’s with him now.

Booth arrives at the restaurant.

BRENNAN: Booth. What are you doing here?

The “I’m sorry I have to hurt you” face

BOOTH: I’m sorry. You’re under arrest for the murder of your brother, Graham Hastings.

WILL: What?

BOOTH: You have the right to remain silent.

BRENNAN: What is this, Booth?

BOOTH: He did it. Cam found his blood on the axe and Hodgins found chemicals that only a firefighter would have access to.

WILL: I didn’t kill Graham. We fought, that’s all.

BRENNAN: You were out there in the woods that night?

WILL: Please don’t look at me like that. Please. I was just helping my brother. He said the film was going to make him famous.

BOOTH: So you got the animal bones, the blood, and you made the chopping sound with the axe.

WILL: He wanted me to stay out of sight. But the girl, Lori, he slipped her drugs and she was screaming and I said I wasn’t going to help anymore. And I said I wouldn’t throw the blood on her, so he did it, and she went crazy and you saw her. Graham did that to her.

Brennan: Will.

WILL: I had to stop him. Okay? I can’t be responsible for raising a monster like that.

BOOTH: So you hit him with the axe.

WILL: He was just lying there, and I was waiting for him to move. And I’ve never – I never even hit him before, no matter how difficult he got.

BOOTH: And then you chopped off his head and you buried him to make it look like some witch did it.

WILL: No. She did it. She did it. Maggie Cinders was out there that night and she made me do it. She told me never to tell anybody. Maggie Cinders made me cut off his head. That’s the only way it could happen. You know me. He was my brother. I could never kill my own brother. It was her.

BRENNAN: What are you waiting for, Booth?

Angela and Hodgins are looking at more footage from the videotape.

ANGELA: The FBI needs me to finish cataloging the restored footage.

HODGINS: It’s cool. I don’t have anywhere else to go.

ANGELA: You’ve been great today, Hodgins.

HODGINS: No, no. I haven’t seen that piece.

ANGELA: Yeah, I was working on it before. I just finished rendering.

They see a ghostly white image on the screen.

ANGELA: Um, uh. Could, could be a reflection.

HODGINS: Had to be. Or some moonlight.

ANGELA: Yeah. Uh, moonlight sounds right. Can I stay at your place tonight?

HODGINS: Sure. No problem.

Time for a case/life drama wrap up with B&B:

BRENNAN: I sure know how to pick ’em, don’t I?

BOOTH: Well, you know. Our perceptions are always colored by what we hope and what we fear, what we love. We do the best we can.

BRENNAN: I’m afraid my best isn’t good enough. I can read bones, not people.

BOOTH: Well, you had no trouble seeing through me.

BRENNAN:  It’s a good thing I like being alone.

BOOTH: You know what? Bones, you’re not alone. Okay? Come here.

BRENNAN: Booth.

BOOTH: Hey, you’re my partner. Okay? It’s a guy hug. Take it.

Contentment.

Comfort.

Bonus Booth with his gambling chip photo: