Woman in the Car (1×11)

“The Woman in the Car”

 

Writer: Noah Hawley

Director: Dwight Little

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STACIE: I’m Stacie Goodyear and joining me on Wake Up, D.C. is Dr. Temperance Brennan.  She is the Author of the best-selling mystery novel “Bred in the Bone” and she’s also, now tell me if I get this wrong, an anthropologist who works with the F.B.I. to solve crimes?

BRENNAN: Yes, that’s correct.  I use the bones of people who have been murdered, or burned, or blown up, or eaten by animals or insect or just decomposed.

STACIE: Well that’s exciting…uh…Dr. Brennan your book has sold over 300,000 copies.  How do you juggle twin careers as a best-selling author and a crime-fighting scientist?

BRENNAN: Well, I do one, then the other.

STACIE:   And is the work enjoyable?  I mean, the part involving rotten bodies?

BRENNAN: Enjoyable?  Well, satisfying, yes.  Like cracking a code.  Bun in general, when you’re looking at someone who’s been brutally murdered . . . it’s complicated.

STACIE: Doesn’t leave you much time for a personal life, does it?

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Right on cue, Booth enters the scene.

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BRENNAN: It’s true I’m more focused on my career right now…

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Smile, Brennan!

 

 

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Can’t resist that charm smile!

STACIE: Most of our viewers are parents at home with their preschool-aged children. What will you tell your kids about the horrors that you see everyday?

 

BRENNAN: I’m not going to have any children.

STACIE: Really?

BRENNAN: Yes, really.

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And….there goes the interview.

 

Off to the crime scene…

BOOTH: One burned backpack, child-size sneaker plus the right side of her seat belt went missing, sliced away.

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BRENNAN: You think it was a kidnapping?

BOOTH: I have to act that way.  The first 48 hours after a child abduction are crucial.  That’s why you’re here.  You I.D. that victim, that tells me what kid I’m looking for.

Goodman comes in with a newcomer, of which Hodgins instantly dislikes.

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GOODMAN: Miss Pickering will require a few minutes of everyone’s’ time to perform a routine security review.  I expect everyone to be cooperative…

HODGINS: I’m not swearing any damn loyalty oath.

GOODMAN: …And civil.

PICKERING: Didn’t I see you on television this morning, Dr. Brennan?

BRENNAN: How could I possibly know what you watched on television?

GOODMAN: Maybe work your way up to Dr. Brennan.

Brennan tells Booth she has an idea.

BOOTH: You know if this works, I’m gonna buy you a puppy.

BRENNAN: That would be inadvisable…You never told me how I was this morning.  I asked, “How did I do?’  You said, “We’ll talk about it in the car.”  We never did.

BOOTH: Was it your first TV interview?

BRENNAN: Yes.

BOOTH: It was fine, you know, for your first interview.

BRENNAN: That was a qualified response.

BOOTH: What?  No.  It was lively.

BRENNAN: Lively?  What kind of word is that?

BOOTH: It’s an adjective. Though ironically, most works that end in a “Y” are adverbs, like “Ironically.”

BRENNAN: Okay, what did I do wrong?

BOOTH: Next time, tell a funny story. Oh, and never, never say you don’t like children.

BRENNAN: I didn’t say I don’t like children.  I said I don’t want any.

BOOTH: On TV it’s the same thing.

Booth and Brennan hit the field. Brennan notices a car seat in Booth’s car.

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BRENNAN: Arrest someone really small lately? Car seat in back?

BOOTH: I had Parker for the weekend

BRENNAN: I don’t know how you do that.

BOOTH: Install a car seat in an F.B.I. vehicle?

BRENNAN: Bring a kid into this world, knowing what you know.  I’ll bet Parker was an accident, right? Because his mother wouldn’t marry you?  What?

BOOTH: It never occurred to you that might be a sensitive topic?

BRENNAN: Well, you could’ve gone with the very small felon story.

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LOL!

BOOTH: It’s better for Parker being in the world, someday you will see that.

BRENNAN: I won’t.

BOOTH: You’ll change your mind.

BRENNAN: I don’t do that.

BOOTH: You will.

 

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Yup.

 

Out in the field, they find a suspect who’s running away.

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BOOTH: F.B.I.!

DRIVER: U.S. Marshals!

BRENNAN: Forensic Anthropologist!  That’s why no gun.

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Hahahahaha.

Back on the case…

BRENNAN: You believe the boy is already dead?

BOOTH: I have to assume that he isn’t.

BRENNAN: Why make that assumption?

BOOTH: Because it gives me something to look forward to instead of dread.  Given a choice, I avoid dread.

BRENNAN: Okay.  That’s logical.

BOOTH: Is it?

BRENNAN: Why dread something that hasn’t happened yet?

They watch a video of the missing boy and his father riding a bike.

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BRENNAN: I’m just wondering what is the benefit from watching this video.

BOOTH: You put faces to names.  You get a sense of human beings.  Come on, Bones.  You’re the anthropologist.  What does this tape tell you?

BRENNAN: Learning to ride a bicycle is a kind of right of passage.  It has anthropological significance.

BOOTH: Really?

BRENNAN: It carries meaning beyond the simple mechanics of learning to ride a bike.

BOOTH: Are you being psychological?

BRENNAN: Definitely not.  Psychology is about the individual.  I’m speaking to a set of cultural proxies and mores.

BOOTH: What the hell are you talking about?

BRENNAN: The father is tight.  He’s holding his arms, touching his mouth—

BOOTH: So he’s nervous.  So what?

BRENNAN: Look at the boy.  He’s relaxed.  He’s not afraid.

BOOTH: So then, why was the boy stalling, huh?

BRENNAN: He’s not the father is.  The son understands that on some level, and he’s enabling his father to reach some level of comfort.  It’s a symbiotic relationship.

BOOTH: Relationship…that’s psychology.

BRENNAN: The boy trusts his father absolutely.  He’s confident.  The Father wishes he didn’t have to do this, but he’s accepted that he must in his role as a Father.  What?

Is Brennan reading emotions and body language? Isn’t that Booth’s thing? When did she lose this ability?

Meanwhile, Angela is getting questioned by the security person.

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PICKERING: Twenty-five address in six countries in eight years.

ANGELA: That’s weird right?

PICKERING: What where you doing in all those places?

ANGELA: Different things.  Mostly looking.  I’m an artist.

PICKERING: When was the last time you saw your husband?

ANGELA: My husband?

PICKERING: Yes.

ANGELA: Oh. Oh.  Wow.  You mean that actually took?  Really?  It didn’t seem legal.  We were in Fiji.  You know there was a fire dance.  You know how those things can go, right?

And Hodgins ISN’T being questioned…

HODGINS: Why aren’t you interviewing me?

PICKERING: It won’t be necessary.

HODGINS: I knew it.  They think my dossier is complete.  They think they know everything about me.  Well they’re wrong!

ZACH: Be happy they’re leaving you alone.

HODGINS: Harmless?  I’m harmless.

PICKERING: Yes.  You don’t pose a viable threat.

HODGINS: Well, that’s insulting.

PICKERING: If you want me to interview you I will.  But I’ll only discover what’s already been found.  You are benign.

HODGINS: I am not benign lady.  I’m not harmless. I’m malignant. I’m a loaded cannon…I know things that would make your blood curdle.  Including a formula that literally curdles blood!

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Now it’s Zach’s turn-

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PICKERING: Mr. Zach Addy I require your full attention.

ZACH: No you don’t, but I’ll give it to you.

PICKERING: I need to establish that you are not a threat to the security of this country.

ZACH: I’m getting a degree in forensic anthropology another in engineering.  What are you afraid of?  That I’ll build a race of criminal robots who’ll destroy the world.

PICKERING: Do you have that kind of fantasy often?

ZACH: Very often.

PICKERING: Does it concern you that such adolescent are a sign of emotional retardation?

ZACH: I’ve been told.  I’m working on it.

PICKERING: And can you understand why that concerns us?

ZACH: Not really.

PICKERING: Hypothetically, you have a piece of information.

ZACH: Secret and meaningful information?

PICKERING: Yes.  The security of the nation is at stake.  Could I bribe you to give it to me?

ZACH: No.

PICKERING : Threaten you?

ZACH: No.

PICKERING: What if I made a rational argument, very persuasive?

ZACH: Merely persuasive?

PICKERING: Irrefutable.  I make an irrefutable argument as to why you should give me this piece of information. Would you do so?

ZACH: Not without checking with Dr. Brennan or Angela first.  See what they’d say, maybe Agent Booth if he talked to me, he probably wouldn’t.  I’d check with Dr. Hodgins but he’d say it was all part of a conspiracy so I mostly only take his advice on women.

So when did Zach chuck all of that out the window to believe a creepy guy who makes teeth bombs?

Booth and Brennan are back on the case. Brennan gets playful.

BRENNAN: You just told me not to jump to a conclusion!

BOOTH: No offense intended.

BRENNAN: You were right.  I usually get to tell you that.

BOOTH: Well our relationship has taken a whole new turn.

With a new tip, they go out again in pursuit.

BOOTH: Secure the building, no one in or out.  Usually, I enjoy your company, Bones.  It’s times like these that you give me a little something else to worry about.

BRENNAN: You enjoy my company?

Relationship growth, awwwww….

They find the father and make a deal that he’ll testify if his son is found safe.

BOOTH: Mr Decker, you and Donovan, you have a code word?  Something to let him know that you sent me?

DECKER: Paladin.  Tell Donovan, “Paladin.”

CULLEN: Paladin.  Defender of the faith, protector.  Suits you Booth.

BRENNAN: You know what?  You tough guys are all very sentimental.

They get sent a finger in the mail.

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BRENNAN: Who does this?  Cuts the finger off an eight-year-old boy.

BOOTH: Mercenaries.  Professionals.  They don’t feel a thing.

BRENNAN: I feel things Booth.

BOOTH: I never said you didn’t Bones.

BRENNAN: I’m a professional, too.  I do better work if I only see the finger and not the child.  It doesn’t mean I’m like them.

BOOTH: Look, I know that Bones.  But what I also know is that they made a big mistake sending us that finger.

BRENNAN: Why?  Because it made you mad?

BOOTH: No.  Because you’re going to use it to catch them.  So, you gather up your squint squad.  Let’s get to work.

The squints find some intricate evidence.

BOOTH: We’re looking for an abandoned gas station or mechanic shop.   You know you guys are geniuses.

ZACH: How do we find that?

BOOTH: I work for the F.B.I., idiot.

HODGINS: Way to go Zach.  We went from genius to idiot in 3 seconds.

That scene just cracked me up!

Meanwhile, Brennan is getting interviewed.

PICKERING: Can you tell me what you were doing in Cuba?

BRENNAN: Only if you tell me first.

PICKERING: I beg your pardon?

BRENNAN: I don’t know your security clearance.

PICKERING: Well, what is your security clearance?

BRENNAN: You should check with the state department.

PICKERING: I’m from the state department.

BRENNAN: Then that should make it easy for you.

PICKERING:When you were in Cuba, did you meet with a man named, Juan Guzman?

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BRENNAN: Hello. It’s Dr. Brennan from the Jeffersonian.  You told me to call you if anyone asked about . . . you know, him.  Someone from the state department named Samantha Pickering.

PICKERING: Pickering. Yes sir.  Yes.  I’ll wait . . . I’ll wait here.

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BRENNAN: Any more questions?

PICKERING: No.  Uh, no.  In fact the entire review has been suspended.  I’m to wait here for someone to come and destroy my notes.

Don’t mess with Brennan. Now, for some partner learning time.

BRENNAN: You can triangulate her position?

BOOTH: Yeah to within 75 square miles.  There was six abandoned gas stations in that area.  There were five urban one rural.  S.W.AT.’s team gonna check them all out but I think it’s the rural one.

BRENNAN: Why?

BOOTH: Because I use to do this kind of work.

BRENNAN: What, rescuing people?

BOOTH: Or being the person they needed to be rescued from.

BRENNAN: Oh.

They are conversing with SWAT about what to do.

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BRENNAN: What about me?

BOOTH: Wait outside.

BRENNAN: But I don’t wanna miss anything.

BOOTH: Bones these guys aren’t like anyone you’ve every come up against.  Please, just be someone you aren’t for the next ten minutes and hang back.  Please.

This time, Brennan agrees. Booth goes in.

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They save the boy, and now its time to wrap it all up.

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BOOTH: We’ll let the grand jury figure that out.  We did our job.

BRENNAN:   It’s not often I get to help save someone before they die.

BOOTH: Bones, every time you catch a murderer, you save his next victim.

BRENNAN:   This is different.

BOOTH: Yeah.  Still glad you don’t have any kids?

BRENNAN: Yeah. Why?

BOOTH: Looking at that boy and his dad.  I just thought you’d change your mind.

BRENNAN:   No.  Still glad you do have a kid?

BOOTH: Gladder today than yesterday.

BRENNAN:   Doesn’t make any sense.

BOOTH: Yeah, it’s complicated.

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Atta boy/girl 🙂

 

 

 

This episode had a lot of Booth gun action. Here’s a bonus one from mid-episode:

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Woman at the Airport (1×10)

“The Woman at the Airport”

Episode 1×10

Written By: Teresa Lin

Directed by: Greg Yaitanes

(Pardon the lack of pictures, but I couldn’t find many online! Use your imagination or pull out your DVDs!)

Dr. Goodman instructs Brennan and Zack about authenticating some ancient remains. Zack tries some word play:

Brennan: X-rays, pictures, we’re going to do this without touching the actual skeleton as much as possible.

Zack: Kid gloves?

Brennan: Latex should be all right. (Pauses) Zack, were you being metaphoric?

Zack: I decided to give it a shot, which is also metaphoric.

LOL

Enter our Very Special FBI agent with a job for Brennan.

Brennan: (sighs) I need a receptionist.  I can’t just have anybody waltzing in here.

He of course wants Brennan’s help on a far away case.

Brennan: I can’t go to Los Angeles.  I have an Iron Age warrior to authenticate.

Booth:  Iron Age warrior, when was the Iron Age?

Brennan: Fifteen hundred years ago.

Booth: Fresh body bits just a little more urgent.

Bones: You do realize there are a lot more fresh bodies then there are perfect specimens from the Iron Age?

Booth: You know, when you say things like that it’s just to bug me, right?

Brennan and Booth bicker enough to get Goodman involved.

Dr. Goodman: Do we have to go through this every time?

Booth: Exactly.

Brennan: Booth can’t just walk in and say pack your bags we’re going to LA.

Dr. Goodman: The point is Agent Booth, Dr. Brennan is in great demand on several pressing cases and she’s needed here at the museum.  Why should I send her to California?

Booth: Sexy case in Hollywood.  How much more good press could the Jeffersonian get?

Booth knows his audience, and administrator Goodman is interested.

Brennan: But, Dr. Goodman, you said the Iron Age warrior was of the highest priority.

Dr. Goodman: I can step in on that case.  You pack your bags.

They end up in LA in a sweet ride.

Brennan: This car doesn’t feel very FBI-y.

Booth: Bones this is a nineteen sixty-six Mustang.  It’s a classic and what goes better then that with the FBI?

Brennan: How come on the rental agreement under model you made the guy write sedan?

Booth: C’mon. We’re in California. Look, palm trees.

Brennan: You know I’d like to drive sometimes.

Booth: Look, our contact out here is Special Agent Trisha Finn.

Brennan: I’m an excellent driver.

Booth: Okay, Rain Man.

Brennan: I don’t know what that means.

Booth: I’m always gonna drive. You know that, right?  Me behind the wheel; you over there on the grandma side.

I forgot how early the “driving discussions” went!

Brennan: I’m not above telling Deputy Director Cullen what kind of car you rented.

Remember when Brennan used to understand some basic social interactions, like blackmail? Well, it worked. Look at how thrilled Booth is about Brennan driving!

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Meanwhile, Early Cranky Hodgins even finds fault with Goodman and his motives.

Hodgins: When you declare something authentic you run the risk of being proven wrong.  That doesn’t happen if you equivocate. As head of the Jeffersonian, Dr. Goodman will place the reputation of the institution over everything else.

Dr. Goodman: I’m an archaeologist.  My findings will be congruent with the facts.

Hodgins: With all due respect, you used to be an archaeologist.

Back in LA, Brennan realizes the victim has had lots of facial surgery, and was pulled apart by dogs or coyotes.

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Zack tells her she should find celebrities while out in LA.

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Booth again must deal with Brennan’s much better accommodations while they travel.

Booth: My hotel doesn’t even have a pool.

Brennan: Well, you’re welcome to use mine.

Poor Zach tries to figure out why Goodman and Hodgins are not getting along.

Zack: What’s with Goodman and Hodgins?

Angela: Oh, they’re guys.  They should just lay them out on the table and measure.

Zack: Lay what out on the table and measure?

Angela: Okay, awkward moment. Let’s just say they have different approaches and they’re guys, okay?

Zack: I’m a guy.

Angela: You’re more highly evolved.

Great answer Angela! lol

Brennan is having a hard time understanding the victim’s interest in surgery as they wait to question a doctor about the case.

Brennan: Every culture nurtures ideals of beauty toward which people strive. Fine, but in the future people will look back upon the surgical alterations of the nose or breasts or buttocks with the same horror that we regard binding of the feet or the use of bronze coils to extend the neck.

Booth: Do you want to speak up because it’s really hard to hear every word in this very very quiet waiting room?

Brennan: It’s barbaric.  It’s painful. It’s wrong.  This murder victim may never be identified because some glorified barber with a medical degree had the arrogance to think that he could do better than the millennium of evolution.

Goodman waxes eloquently about the Iron Age man’s life and Hodgins is frustrated at the suppositions and snaps at his boss. Angela calls him out on it but he responds:

Hodgins: Science is no country for storytellers, baby.

Meanwhile, B&B are still looking into the call girl murder and Booth gets an idea, using Brennan’s cell phone.

Booth: Hey, Miss Bardu.  Hi. Special Agent Booth.  I’ve reconsidered your offer.  I was wondering if I could have one of your ladies visit me today?

Brennan: Ordering a prostitute from my cell phone?

Booth: I was wondering if Rachel ever took part in any of those two on one specials.

Hodgins: Hey the old two on one special, classic.

Zack: What’s a classic?

Booth: That’s great. Just send me whoever she worked with the most.

Brennan: You’re ordering a hooker to my hotel?

Zack: Did I hear you say hooker?

Hodgins: How come I never get to go on these out of town trips?

Booth: (to Bones) ‘Cause you have much looser daily allowances then I do.

Brennan: Well have fun.  I have to get up early tomorrow.

At his “date”…

Leslie: Oh, you’re one of those guys.

Booth: What guys?

Leslie: One of those guys who say they just want to talk.

Booth: I do just want to talk.  I’m an FBI agent.

Leslie: Okay, I get the drill.  What am I playing?

Booth: No, really. Leslie, I really am an FBI agent. I just want to ask you some questions that’s all.

Leslie: About what?

Booth: About your friend Rachel. Look I’m sorry but I think…I think she’s been murdered.

Leslie: This can’t be happening. Oh God, Rachel was so nice.  She was really an actress. You know, the way I’m really a singer.  We all say we’re something different then what we are. None of us want to be what we are.

While Booth sits by the pool, Brennan is meeting with Hollywood elite:

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Interviewer: I’m here with Penny Marshall one of the most prolific hyphenates in Hollywood.  Actress, producer, and director of such hits as A League of Their Own and Big.  Her latest project is bred in the Bone. It’s a thriller based on the best selling novel by crime fighting anthropologist, Dr. Temperance Brennan. Okay, so how did this all come together?

Brennan: I have no idea.

Penny: Well my brother Gary gave me the book and I liked it and then this whole bidding war started and I usually don’t get into that kind of thing but in this case…

Interviewer: A bidding war?  That’s got to be a thrill for a first time author.

Brennan: I wasn’t actually there.

Interviewer: You must be a big fan of Penny’s films so, which one is your favorite?

Brennan: I enjoyed her humorous treatment of the time space paradox.

Interviewer: Big!

Penny: That’s very funny. Time Space Paradox.

Interviewer: Penny who is going to write the script?

Brennan: Don’t I get to do that?

Penny: We’ll talk.

Brennan gets a call about the case and leaves the interview.

Penny: Would you look at that… passion?

Back at the lab…

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Dr. Goodman: I have an announcement.

Hodgins: You’re unable to positively authenticate the skeleton.

Dr. Goodman: That is correct.

Hodgins: Told you.

Dr. Goodman: Given the inconsistencies between the specimens’ geographic location and physio argumentum artifacts I cannot in good faith authenticate the find.

Angela: Is this because of how I made him look? ‘Cause there’s a certain amount of subjectivity involved in recreating a face.

Dr. Goodman: Certain amount, yes but the fact is he displays Pictish features.  For all we know this skull doesn’t belong to this body.

Zack: Even though on x-rays it looks at though the head is properly attached to the spinal cord. We could actually go in and look, confirm the authenticity.

Dr. Goodman: I declined to continue the investigation at this time.  We will store the remains in the interim.

Hodgins: I knew this was going to happen!

Angela: Hodgins.

Dr. Goodman: Because we have been colleagues on this more then superior and subordinate, I have allowed you to be insubordinate but I warn you Dr. Hodgins that is over.

Hodgins: Do you want my letter of resignation?

Zack: You know what would be better put them on the table and measure, Alright?

LOL

Angela: Okay look, everybody just turn and walk away.

Hodgins: If you want me to resign, just say so.

Dr. Goodman: Miss Montenegro is right.

Angela: (to Hodgins) You think you just won something. I’m telling you Goodman was the bigger man.

Do you agree with Angela?

B&B are stuck in their case. They interviewed a boyfriend on the beach but got nowhere.

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Casual B&B!

Brennan: We know we’re looking for someone who grew up in New England and moved here about eight years ago.  Her leg was crushed in a car accident when she was thirteen.  She was on a boat shortly before she was murdered. We know some of her names and some of her faces.

Booth: That’s all your stuff, okay. Usually by now we know more about my stuff.

Brennan: We have separate stuff?

Booth: Yeah by now I usually have a feel for the person. What they wanted.  How they felt. What was going on in their lives? With this girl, nothing.

Brennan: She thought she was ugly. She did everything she could to make herself beautiful and all she did was make herself more invisible.

Booth: Everybody in this city thinks they’re ugly, huh, and nobody is. I’m starting to get why you hate anonymous death so much.

Brennan: We were born unique. Our experiences mold and change us. We become someone. All of us and to have that taken away by murder, to be erased from existence against our will, it’s just…

Booth: Evil?

Brennan: Unacceptable.  These bones you bring me, I give them a face. I say their names out loud. I return them to their loved ones and you arrest the bad guy.  I like that.

Booth: So do I.

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Brennan: I feel like we should be arresting these doctors because whether they killed her or not they…they still erased her.

 

Back at the lab, Goodman explains himself.

Dr. Goodman: I am an archaeologist.  This is what we do.  We step outside the facts and tell ourselves the story of an individual or a culture and if the story I tell myself about this man who lived fifteen hundred years ago is true.  If he was laid to rest by people who respected and loved him, don’t I owe it to them not to let the pure scientist desecrate his remains?

Hodgins: Or you could be totally rational and say you were waiting for imaging technology to improve to the point where it wasn’t necessary to disassemble him.

Dr. Goodman: Ah, yes. I suppose I could say that. It’s less…

Hodgins: Sentimental for the pure scientists.

B&B figure out the murder is one of the basic reasons. Jealously.

Booth: She thought Atlas was going to take her out of that life.

Brennan: He wanted the girl next door. You were right, jealousy.

Booth: Well it’s an old story. Bet your fifteen hundred year old friend back home heard a version. Leslie thought Rachel was stealing her man so she killed her.

Brennan: What did she ask you?

Booth: What?

Brennan: She asked you something after she was arrested.  What was it?

Booth: She asked me if I thought she was beautiful.  I got one more thing. (He pulls some papers out of his back pocket.) I had the Bureau search for adolescent girls that were injured in car crashes in the upper northeast ten to twelve years ago.

(Booth hands Bones the paper and it’s a newspaper.  There is an article titled “Local Woman Killed In Car Crash, Daughter Survives.”]

Booth: Daughter’s right leg was crushed.

Brennan: Allison. Her name was Allison Holmes.

Booth: Her father and her brother are still alive somewhere in Bangor, Maine. We will return the remains.

Brennan: Thanks Booth.

Booth: Well, Bones, you do your thing.  I do mine.

Brennan: Look at her.

Booth: Yeah, pretty little thing.

I love Brennan’s desire to find the truth and Booth’s willingness to help her find it. I also love how he is not interested in any of the shiny things in LA, but has always dated smart women who are top in their field. I love Hodgins’ and Goodman’s passions even when they conflict with each other. So much to love about season 1!!

Happy 4th of July!

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Booth is dazzled to see us, as always!

Hey all. Sorry, I got back later than expected from vacay. I got to meet some verrrrry cute boys this past weekend.

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Yes, I got to meet my beloved Backstreet Boys at their residency in Vegas! Won some meet and greet tickets…which is a good thing because man, those are expensive! Anyways, I apologize for the Bones Tuesday delays and we will be back up and running next week. I hope you all had a wonderful holiday weekend (if you are in the USA) and this guy who can’t quit playing military-men-with-relationship-issues agrees with me 🙂

(DB in his new show)

B&B on vacation

Hi all! I am gone for the week with my fam enjoying some lake time, but I wanted to keep Bones Tuesday alive with a short post–just vacation themed!

I know the Honeymoon episode was poorly received (for good reason!) but checking out some pictures of it was fun. Emily looked gorgeous as usual and DB looked hilarious in his vacation gear.

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It’s just not fair. I want to be Emily!

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And to sit pool side with this goofball 🙂

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I guess they both got what they wanted, Brennan got skeletons, and Booth got to wear great hats and drink by the pool! lol I guess all the romantic stuff was off screen as usual! We’ll give them the benefit of doubt and assume they were very busy with that off screen!

What do you think family vacations are like now with both kiddos?

Man in the Fallout Shelter (1×9)

“The Man in the Fallout Shelter”
Episode 1×09
Written By: Hart Hanson
Directed by: Greg Yaitanes

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ANGELA: Sweetie, could you stop galloping for, like, two seconds?
BRENNAN: Better able to withstand peer pressure when you can’t catch me.
ANGELA: Call it a favor, okay?
BRENNAN: How is me going to a company Christmas party doing you a favor?
ANGELA: Remember what happened last year?
BRENNAN: I didn’t go last year.
ANGELA: Yeah, exactly. And it took me weeks to collect all those photocopies.
BRENNAN: Twenty minutes.

Cue Booth’s entrance. Again, he “saves the day” by bringing Brennan work!

BOOTH: Bones! All right.
BRENNAN: What’s the context?

Guess what? It’s a man in a fallout shelter!

BOOTH: Merry Christmas, Bones. Come on, boys, bring it in.
ANGELA: Oh, no. We are going to the company Christmas party.
BRENNAN: Booth, will you escort Angela to the Christmas party and make sure she doesn’t photocopy her butt?

Booth gets dragged away under protest. Enter the two kings of the lab, Zach with a robot.

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HODGINS: You robot reminds me of you. You tell it to turn, it stops. You tell it to stop, it turns. You ask it to take out the garbage, it watches reruns of Firefly.

Everyone (including Booth) has left or avoided the party. Angela tries to rally the group.

ANGELA: Okay, you people listen to me. There is a party going on upstairs, okay? A Christmas party. We’re going up there. We’re gonna talk to some people, we’re gonna sing some carols, we’re gonna drink some eggnog.

Unfortunately, there is lab contamination. They are stuck.

BRENNAN: There’s no use panicking until we know what it is.
BOOTH: What what is?

 

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WHY DIDN’T THIS HAPPEN MOREEEEE????

HODGINS: Uh, we might know.
ZACK: I cut into the fallout shelter bones and the biohazard alarm went off.
GOODMAN: Were you conforming to autopsy protocol?
ZACK: One of us was.
HODGINS: The other was… drinking an eggnog.
GOODMAN: And you didn’t have your mask on. Oh…

HAL: The pathogen is coccidioidomycosis.
GOODMAN: Valley fever?
BOOTH: What’s valley fever?
ZACK: It’s a fungus that can lead to pneumonia, meningitis, spontaneous abortion, death.

 

HODGINS: Hey, I got into the decontamination shower with Zack. Haven’t I been through enough hell?
BOOTH: Is he contagious?
HAL: Dr. Hodgins may have inhaled the spores, yes. We have no choice but to impose quarantine. Valley fever can be fatal, and we can’t risk a pandemic. Just calm down and let us handle things from this side.
BOOTH: Okay, you know what? If this is fatal, I will shoot both of you.

After being told the treatment and protocol, Booth is still not satisfied.

BOOTH: Whoa, whoa, whoa. You’re saying that we’re stuck here over Christmas? Look, you know, I have… places to go, you know? I have obligations.
GOODMAN: We all have obligations.

They all try to assign blame.

ZACK: Who brought us human remains just to ditch a little paperwork?
BOOTH: Oh, you’re saying this is my fault?
GOODMAN: You knew Dr. Brennan could not resist.

Haha, the squints are onto Booth bringing her work all the time. LOL!
BRENNAN: I’d have been able to resist if I was in Niger, where I wanted to be.
GOODMAN: You’re blaming me.
We find out there may be side effects to the meds. Yep, enter stoned Booth!

BOOTH: I never realized how pretty all this shiny stuff is.
HODGINS: That is so not fair.

BOOTH: What are those little tiny lights dancing on the ceiling?
GOODMAN: For the third time, those are minute firings of neurons on your optic nerve due to your reaction to the antifungal cocktail.
BOOTH: Wow. They’re beautiful.

We get some backstory as Booth and Goodman share family stories. They both have kids!

BOOTH: You know, I have a kid too. His name’s Parker. He’s four years old. His mother wouldn’t marry me, so my parental rights are totally-
GOODMAN: Vague?
BOOTH: That word’s just a little bit Christmasier than what I was thinking.

Enter Brennan’s backstory…

ANGELA: It’s all so tragic. A cheap wedding ring sewn into his suit, two tickets to Paris. It makes you wonder. Who was the girl? Can you imagine what it was like for her, waiting and wondering, never knowing what happened.
BRENNAN: I don’t have to imagine.

Which brings me to one of my favorite Boothy pictures ever.

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BOOTH: Bones, it’s after midnight. Hmm? Christmas Eve day. Both an eve and a day. It’s a Christmas miracle.
BRENNAN: Still enjoying your medication, I see…Well, how would you like me to spend my Christmas?
BOOTH: Christmas is the perfect time to reexamine your standing with, you know…
BRENNAN: A helicopter pilot?
BOOTH: Oh, right, right. You can’t measure the man upstairs in a beaker, so he can’t possibly exist.
BRENNAN: The man upstairs?

BOOTH: Mmm. You know, you don’t know if you’re sick, but you’re more than willing to take drugs just in case. It seems to me you could give the man upstairs the same benefit of the doubt that you do an invisible fungus.

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(Might be one of the best presentations of Christianity to an atheist I’ve ever heard.)

Meanwhile, Angela is very focused on making Christmas special. And they put pieces together.

ANGELA: We’ll decorate this place and exchange handmade gifts.
GOODMAN: An excellent idea, Miss Montenegro.
ZACK: I can get behind that.
HODGINS: I’m in.
GOODMAN: As am I.
BOOTH: How ‘bout Bones? Aw, come on. What’s the deal with Bones and Christmas?
ANGELA: Last night I spun a little story about two young lovers running off to Paris. But the man never shows up, and the woman is left wondering what happened to him. And I say, “Imagine what that must have been like.” And Brennan says, “I don’t have to.”
BOOTH: Yeah I- I still don’t get it.
GOODMAN: Oh my God.
BOOTH: What?
ANGELA: Brennan’s parents disappeared just before Christmas when she was fifteen.
GOODMAN: And she never knew what happened to them.
BOOTH: Oh, God. That explains a lot.

Angela still wants the party to happen.

ANGELA: Alright, we need a way to choose our Secret Santas.
ZACK: I could build a random generator.
GOODMAN: Ah, wouldn’t it be better to match complimentary people in a premeditated manner?

LOL, they are all so squinty. But Booth just puts names in a bucket.

BOOTH: Pick a name, and if you get your own, put it back in.
GOODMAN: Oh, that could work.

Hahaha.

Booth and Brennan end up talking about Christmas as they work on the case.

BRENNAN: Anthropologically speaking, gifts are a way of asserting dominance in a group. Now imagine an entire holiday devoted to self-promotion, especially in this materialistic culture. How can you expect me to get behind that? How can you get behind it?
BOOTH: Wow, that’s deep. That’s a very deep pile of crap.

Goodman spills the beans.

GOODMAN: Decorations do not a Christmas make. Family and friends make Christmas.
HODGINS: We’re friends.
GOODMAN: We are colleagues, friends, coworkers, yes, but for a father like myself, like Agent Booth- -a few glowing test tubes don’t make up with missing Christmas morning with the children.
ANGELA: Excuse me?
ZACK: Be kind, rewind.
HODGINS: Booth has a kid?
GOODMAN: Ah. Well… Not common knowledge, I gather.

Hodgins spills more of the beans.

BRENNAN: I’m not really who you want to talk to about gifts. Wait- Booth has a kid?
HODGINS: You didn’t know?
BRENNAN: No.
HODGINS: I wasn’t the one who told you.

Can anyone remind of the timeline between Booth and Brennan’s 1st case and now? How long did he not reveal his child to her?!

Brennan sneezes, is it a symptom?

BRENNAN: I sneezed because the air is dry. It’s not valley fever.
GOODMAN: Any other symptoms? Headache?
ZACK: Any foul smelling pustules on your shins?

Hahahaha. Oh Zack.

They continue to investigate. The squint squad considers religion.

GOODMAN: You suppose Lionel came up here to procure an abortion?
ANGELA: You know what? This isn’t a very Christmas Eve type story.
BRENNAN: Of course it is. The whole Christ myth is built upon the travails of an unwed mother.
BOOTH: Okay, can we just stop bringing up the whole Christ myth thing? Alright, some people believe it’s more than just a myth.
BRENNAN: Well, who besides you?
GOODMAN: That would be me, Dr. Brennan. I’m a deacon at my church.
ANGELA: I do. Christmas and Easter, anyway.
HODGINS: Although I believe organized religion is just another political movement designed to control the masses, doesn’t mean God doesn’t love me.
ZACK: Hey, I’m a rational empiricist all the way. Unless you talk to my mother. Then I’m Lutheran.

HAHAHAHA. Zack. Stop. He’s on a roll this episode!

BRENNAN: I can understand why you’d be sensitive, Booth. You have a child out of wedlock.

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Ouch.

ANGELA: Sweetie…
BRENNAN: What?

 

Awkward.

HAL: Visiting hours, folks.

Cue the montage of sweet family moments.

Brennan and Angela talk.

ANGELA: I know your parents disappeared just before Christmas.
BRENNAN: My brother Russ was nineteen and we were still in the house.
ANGELA: That must’ve been strange.
BRENNAN: Russ found our presents in my parents’ room…and Christmas Eve, when I was asleep, he snuck down and made Christmas, trying to do the right thing for me.
ANGELA: Christmas for his little sister.
BRENNAN: But when I came down and saw the lights and the presents…
ANGELA: You thought your parents were back.
BRENNAN: I just expected to see them, sitting there, drinking their coffee, watching Russ and me open our presents.
ANGELA: Oh my God.
BRENNAN: I kind of lost it. I refused to open the presents until they came back… It was like I told Russ he wasn’t enough family for me. Before New Years, he went out west to work and I was in the foster system….The tree is really, really beautiful, Ange. Really.

 

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Its not even fair how beautiful she is!

Angela prompts Brennan to help Ivy find the answers she never got. Booth finds her in her office.

 
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BOOTH: You find something?
BRENNAN: Two things that fit together.

Is it you and Booth?!!? Oh, wait, not for a few more years!

BOOTH: Angela sent me. She says it’s Christmas. (But I’m still a little salty about that comment earlier)
BRENNAN: Okay.
BOOTH: You still think there’s more to learn about Lionel Little and Ivy Gillespie?
BRENNAN: There’s always more to learn.

Foreshadowing!

BRENNAN: Hey. I’m sorry you didn’t get Christmas morning with your little boy.

 

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AKA, I’m sorry for what I said earlier. I’m socially awkward.

BOOTH: Thanks.

 

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AKA: I understand, I forgive you, and I love you. 🙂

At Angela’s long-awaited Christmas party, Zack nails the gift.

 
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ZACK: It’s a self-propelled, non-autonomic unit.
HODGINS: It’s a robot.
ZACK: I thought if we get out of here in time today, you could give it to your son.
BOOTH: Merry Christmas.

They get the all-clear on their health, and everyone runs out….except Booth, who as always, turns to Brennan.
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BRENNAN: Go. Go have Christmas. Wish your boy merry Christmas for me.
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BOOTH: I’m at Wong Foo’s if you decide you want company.

BOOTH: Merry Christmas, Bones.

 

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That face. Those eyes. SWOON.

 

Brennan meets with Ivy and gives her closure.

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Then, she actually goes to Wong Foo’s!

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BRENNAN: Ivy Gillespie came to the lab after you left, with her granddaughter….Don’t you want to know what happened?

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BOOTH: I know what happened. You told her about Careful Lionel. You showed her the letters, the tickets. She cried. But you made her happy.
BRENNAN: Not to mention I gave her a penny worth over a hundred thousand dollars.
BOOTH: She won’t care about that today. You just gave somebody the best Christmas gift they could every get. Who’s the Secret Santa now?

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Her “You’re goofy but cute” face

BRENNAN: Stop.

BOOTH: And that weirdo assistant of yours just made me the coolest dad in the world.

 

PARKER: Daddy!
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BOOTH (in a whisper): Can you say ‘Merry Christmas’?
PARKER (to Brennan): Merry Christmas!

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Brennan goes back to her happy place, the lab, and opens the Christmas gift.

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Such an amazing Bones episode. Written, of course, by evil genius Hart Hanson. Thoughts?

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Technical Difficulties

All my devices have apparently decided to mutiny against me. Or WordPress hates me. I had crafted the entire post, but it would not save nor publish, and I lost it all. Sigh. I will try again to upload this post from my work computer tomorrow. It is 12:28 AM my time and I am officially giving up for today. I will, however, leave you with this gem:

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Tamara’s new show-Altered Carbon

‘Bones’ Star Tamara Taylor Reflects on Cam’s Happy Ending, Teases Her New Netflix Series

https://www.tvinsider.com/239480/bones-tamara-taylor-altered-carbon-netflix/

In Tamara’s head canon, Hodgins gets to remain King of the Lab!

“Though Cam and Arastoo’s wedding was expected, the move to adopt three older children was something that took even Taylor by surprise. “They told me about it an episode before it happened,” she recalls. “It was pretty amazing. I’m really grateful they allowed me to have a happy ending. There were a few near misses, and I was like, ‘Are they going to let me have my prince and kids?'”

The finale also saw Cam temporarily step away from her job to adjust to her new family, and her portrayer isn’t sure if Cam would want her exact job back when she returned. (In her absence, she put Hodgins in charge of the lab.) “Given the fact she’ll have a full family, I think she’d be pretty OK being a part of the team versus their boss,” Taylor speculates. “Even though she spearheaded everything, she was a part of the team. I don’t know if she’d fight for the lab back.'”

On her new show:

“Taylor’s next gig, playing lawyer Oumou Prescott on Netflix’s Altered Carbon (based on the 2002 Richard K. Morgan novel), is a drastically different role for the actress. “I play a not-so-nice lady, which is really fun,” she says. ‘She’s the kind of character who says things that definitely make you want to cringe.’

Taylor hopes fans will tune in when Altered Carbon eventually launches. “It’s eerily beautiful,” she gushes.”